UNDERCOVER SUREILLANCE
by Hannah-SpencerReid-West
Summary: **REWRITTEN** Gay men are being killed throughout the Brooklyn area, the team are called in on the case, but have no leads. The only thing they can think off is to send someone in as undercover. And who better for the role than Dr Spencer Reid. But what happens when the team place camera's in and around Spencers rented apartment without him knowing. **I don't own Criminal Minds**
1. Late, again

"Where is he? Late again" Hotch and the others were all sat in the conference room waiting for Reid to show up. It was the 3rd time in 2 weeks he had been late, which isn't like him, at all. "We'll have to get started without him".

"4 men have all been dumped in different alleyways around the city. They were badly beaten, repeated raped before having their genitals re-removed" Garcia pressed her buttons on her little remote bring up the images off all 4 men. "Jack Winters, 26. Jordan Flanders 24. Hunter Daniel, 25 and the latest victim, Ryota Yamasaki, 25" At that moment Garcia stopped, she could see Reid walking through the ball pen. He walked straight in and sat down next to Morgan, he had a coffee in one hand and his messenger bag in the other. He was wearing the same clothes he was wearing yesterday and his hair was a mess, he looked as if he hadn't got any sleep.

"Reid?" Reid looked up from the case file to have his eye's meet Hotch's.

"Yeah?" He answered bluntly.

"You're late..."

"Yeah, sorry" Everyone was confused, Reid's attitude stank, in the 3 years everyone has known him, Emily being 2, he had never spoken to Hotch like that before. "Reid, my office!" Hotch stood up, he wasn't happy at all, but Reid just sat there, looking over the case file, his hair hung loosely in front of him face. "Now!" Hotch was angry, it shocked everyone, he looked as if he was going red - Metaphorically speaking. Reid stood up putting the case file back onto the table. "Wheels up in 30".

"What the hell was that?" Morgan spoke first. They all grouped around in the ballpen, constantly watching Hotch's office. "Never seen the Kid like that before"

"Definitely not like him" Emily spoke as she watched Reid stand in front of Hotch. "Did you see he was still wearing the same clothes as he was yesterday?"

"Maybe he got lucky" Morgan laughed and JJ just hit him across the arm. "Ow! What was that for?"

"He's not you Morgan" JJ just insulted him and everyone giggled.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Reid what's going on?" Hotch closed the door behind him, and walked over and perched on the edge of his desk, Reid standing in front of him.

"What do you mean?" Reid questioned.

"You know exactly what I mean Spencer. You have been late to work 3 times in the space of 2 weeks, and when you come in late you look a state and you're attitude stinks"

"Sorry"

"A sorry won't cut in Spencer, I want an explanation" Hotch unfolded his arms, rubbed his eyes and sighed. "Look Reid, I am just worried about you. You haven't been yourself recently"

"Hotch honestly I am fine, I've just been struggling to sleep. That's all"

"You're not using again are you?" Reid looked shocked that his boss would even suggest that.

"What! NO!"

"Don't lie to me Reid, you look fucked"

"Hotch, I'm not using, I haven't touched the stuff in nearly 6 months" Hotch just looked at him, he watched the young FBI fallen off the wagon last time and did nothing to help, yes Reid got himself out of it but it was hard for him. Hotch didn't want him going through that all alone again. "Look Reid, if you are or if you do have the need to go back please talk to me, I'm your friend as well as you're boss remember" Reid nodded in approval and headed towards the door. "Oh Reid before you go, I forgot, I need your head in this case"

"What do you mean?" he looked at his boss slightly confused.

"You're going undercover"

The team all watched as the pair talked in the office. "So what was Reid doing last night?" Rossi spoke.

"Before you hit me again JJ, what if he really is seeing someone?" Morgan flinched, JJ just looked at him instead. "He came to work this morning in the same clothes with sex hair"

"If Reid was seeing anybody he would tell us about it" JJ said.

"Well what if he didn't...Reid always has secrets, some we know and some we don't" At that moment Reid and Hotch walked out of his office and headed towards everyone else.

"Why are you all still here? I told you to head to the Jet"

They all settled on the Jet, Reid was sat next to Morgan, both looking over the case file, Hotch and Rossi in the front of him, Emily and JJ to his left. "Right, I have filled Reid in on what's going to be happening during the case. So far with this case, the killing has done well with hiding the bodies and leaving no evidence or anything that can trail back to him, which makes it harder for us. Me and Strauss agreed it would be better if someone were to go undercover, and that's where Reid comes in. So fair all the Victims have been male, aged 24-26, tall, and skinny with brown hair, highly intelligent. Reid is the only one who fits the unsubs preference"

"But isn't going to be dangerous?"

"Reid is a big enough boy to deal with it on his own Morgan" Emily giggled.

"Emily is right though, Reid isn't a kid" Reid smiled a little, everyone has always treated him like such, he's the youngest and most venerable so people baby him a lot, and he hates it.

"Hello my spiced pumpkins" Garcia popped up on the laptop fitted on the table between Morgan and Rossi.

"What you got for us baby girl?"

"Frankie Simmons, aged 25 found down an alley again of the club Plush" Garcia brought the images up on screen. "Wait there's something different, did anyone else have this carving anywhere on their body?"

"Negative, this is the first"

"Fag" Morgan spoke, reading the word which was carved into the new victim's forehead. "Mama, look at all bars and clubs the victims were found near and checked to see if there gay bars"

"What you getting at Derek" Hotch asked.

"Fag is a common term used for gay's right, the men were all badly beaten, and genitalia were removed. This could be a homophobic attack"

"Morgan's you have a point. Garcia pull up the victim's social media and see if any of them were openly gay, or on any dating websites"

"Yes sir!" Garcia saluted and the chat between them ended.

"Wait...does this mean if the victims were all gay male...I told have to pretend to be gay?"

"That would be the plan, yes Reid" Hotch looked at him. Reid just slumped back in his chair, he pushed the hair out of his face. "Not happening"

"Reid, you're going Undercover"

"Can't someone else do it?"

"No Reid they can't, you are the only one who fits the unsub's profile, and I asked you too. What's the big problem?"

"Nothing" Reid answered and again slumped back into his chair. Reid began to panic, for years Reid kept who he was a secret, no one knew much about him and that just how he liked it, the team were always heckling him about getting a girlfriend, or that he needs to get out more, but that's just not him, Reid never admitted to anyone about his sexual orientation in fear that he will he hated and ridiculed, but now with this case anything could happen, so many thoughts ran through his head, _What if they learn that I really am gay?_ "Reid" _They'll hate me I know they will, Derek will stopped talking to me...Oh God! What if I'm kicked off the team?_ "Reid!"

"Yeah?"

"What's wrong?" Morgan asked.

"Nothing Morgan, I'm fine" Morgan knew something was up, but he didn't want to keep annoying him to the part where they fall out. Morgan just sat there why did Reid react the way he did? The kid can't be...no he would have said something to me. Morgan just let his thoughts get washed out by his music.


	2. Why Me?

The jet ride wasn't to bad, New York was only an hour away from Quanico so they only had enough timeto review they case, and learn they all the victims shared the same sexual orientation. It was smack bang in the middle of October so the winter air was coming in, the team walk hastily to the SUV's waiting for them at the airport. "Derek you're sharing a room with me next to Reid so we can keep and eye on him, and the girls will be the floor above us to hide suspision"

"Do I have to share with you?" Morgan moped.

"Is there something wrong Derek?" Hotch raised his eyebrow to him.

"No sir, nothing sir" Morgan, despite being a lot being then Hotch was still rather frightened of him, he didn't let the others know that becuase they will just take the mick out of him.

The ride to the felt like an eternity to Reid, he watched out his window as the cas raced past, the sun was starting to set not that he could really see over the 100ft skyscrapers. He couldn't stop thinking about what could happen, _Why me?_ reid kept saying to himself over an over again, _Could they already know I'm gay? What no that's stupid, Hotch told me I was going undercover AFTER we learnt the victims were gay...what do I do?_

Hotch looked at Reid in the mirror, he knew the kid would be okay but there was this feeling sitting at the bottom of his stomach that just made him worry, Reid had a mind anyone would dream of having, Hotch taught him to use this knowledge the way he does but he never taught him about the real world, not really. Not the emotional side of it all anyway.

They turned up at the apartments, and got everything out of the boot. "Morgan can you take these up to the rooms for me please, I need a word with Reid" Morgan nodded in agreement and left the two agents alone.

"Reid, is everything okay?"

"Why wouldn't it be?" Reid's tone was rather harsh.

"You didn't look to please about going undercover as a gay man"

"Hotch I'm not happy about going undercover what so ever..." Reid's hands were crossed over his chest to keep him warm. "After everything that happened with Tobias, I'm just a little nervous"

"Reid, you don't need to be, we will all be with you are all times" Spencer looked at Hotch, _If there with me 24/7 there really going to find out the truth._ "Right anyway, this is for you" Hotch handed over a fake ID, Reid still used his real name but it was a normal driving license instead of his FBI crodentioals. "Tonight you will head to the bar called Rainbow, this is the closest bar to were the recent killing took place, I want you just to turn up, buy a drink and watch people, if people flirt with you flirt back, mke sure to get the unsubs attention,okay?"

"What if the unsub approches me?"

"Like I said Spencer, we will be with you the entire time. Make sure to be there for 8" Spencer grabbed his bag from the car and headed up to where they would be staying.

The apartment was a lot nicer then Reid thought they would be, the main part was all open plan, the kitchen was based at the back corner of the apartment sharing with the living room, double doors hid the king sized bedroom, which Reid liked a lot as it had a grandsized bookself filled to the brim of every type of book. There was also another set of double doors at the back of the living room which led out onto the balcony. Every apartment had them for what he could see, even Hotch and Derek next door. Reid looked at his watch and realised the time, he found a set of towels in one of the cupboards and headed for the bathroom.

In the next room, Morgan and Hotch sat at the table which was placed near the window. Their room was the exactly like Reids, just a little smaller. Case files layed spreaad out over the wooden top, and coffee in hand. "The kid will be okay won't he?" asked Morgan as he took a sip of he fresh brew. Hotch nodded, "He'll be perfectly fine".

"But how do you know that? We haven't got our eyes on him 24/7..." Morgan was growing more and more conserend for the kid, he was his little brother, and using him as bait...he didn't really like the idea from the start. "Ahhh, but we will be" Morgan looked at him, confused, eyebrows raised. "I'll explain...In Reid's room are 5 camera's as set up in different parts of the apartment. 1 by the front door which will be recording 24/7. Another will be watching over the living room and window, 1 facing his bedroom door, 1 on his bedside table which has a clear veiw of the entire bedroom, including the bathroom and the last will be on the bedroom window" Hotch smiled.

"Why have you got camera's in Reid's room?"

"That's because I'm not only trying to catch the unsub, I want to know if Reid is using again, and if he knows that there are cameras in the room, then he wouldn't act like himself, but put on an act" Morgan looked worried, it was a good idea, but spying on his best mate, it didn't feel right. "Hotch, what happens if he finds out? He might not trust us again?"

"He will never find out, we will say we set up alarms in the room, or we could hear noises in our room as the walls are thin"

"Hotch..."

"Morgan, it will be fine, look, if he does so happen to find out than I will take full responsibility"

"Dam right you will, I had no part in this plan what so ever...any, have you thought about what we could see?"

"What do you mean?"

"Well if the kid is using again, than, well that won't be a pretty sight and to be honest, I don't really want to see my best mate high on drugs" Hotch went to speak but stopped, he didn't actually know how to answer that, he too didn't want to see Reid in that state, after watching him live when being tortured, he felt like that was his own child, and he knew that seeing him torture himself would be even worse. "If that happens, well turn the screens off. If we get enough proof that he is using again, than we'll turn the screens off" Morgan bowed his head, he was worried, worried on what he might see, and worried for Spencer, if he was in so much pain that he'd rather inject himselve with _'that'_ than there is something seriously wrong. "WAIT!" Hotch jumped and nearly spilling his coffee all over his well ironed suit. "What?"

"What if Reid walks around that house naked?" Hotch sniggered.

"I don't think he does" Placing his coffee back onto the table.

"Well you don't know that! I don't really want to see him walking around with his wanger out, not my kind of thing...JJ or Emily, maybe I'd reconsidered, but Reid? I would be inject dringugs into my systems if I saw that, and you can hold me to that" Hotch just started to laugh, it was rare to see Aaron, a man who always looks sturn and unaproachable, laugh.

The hot water flowed onto the Reid dainty body, steam rising as hitting the cold surface of the glass and mirror. The idea of being undercover ran around in Reid's mind, what could go wrong, what will happen in he's discovered, what happens if the team find out he's really gay...he felt as if his head was gonna explode. Reid was use to going to gay bars back at home, but there he new everybody, here, he's just no one. Anything could happen, the team will be watching him at all times, by any random chance someone he knew could come in and revealing everything. Reid was getting more and more worried but then he thought, that at the same time he was prending to be someone who he really is, he can flirt and chat up some really hot guy at the bar and the team wouldn't even batter and eyelid.

Reid smiled, his body began to relax, the idea of going undercover, made Reid kinda hot. The hot water ran down Reids body, he began to trail it with his hands, making himself shiver at his touch. Reid was use to another mans touch, he's not like Morgan, he doesn't sleep around but lately he's been more chill about it all and found it rather exciting, it's getting him into trouble at work but it's worth it for a good fuck.

He could feel himself become hard, the blood flow from his head to his dick and the heat from the shower made him going a little light headed. He was fighting the urge, this wasn't the time, but his whole body began to tingle, he needed to feel something even if was just quickly. Reid closed his eyes and pictured himself with one of his favourite actors, he imagined himself sliding deep inside the man's tight hole, a small moan escape Reid's lips as he took his length in his grasp.

Reid's head fell back just from the thought, god did he want to fuck someone right now, he could feel his dick pulsate. His eyes closed as he worked his cock, the moans started out softly but as he pase grew so did the sounds escaping his mouth. "Ahhh fuck!".

He picture himself raming his cock deep into the actors ass, hearing his moans as Reid dominated him, imaginging his body under his. When Reid is invited back to ther guys houses, they all get a little shocked when the cute and innocent Spencer Reid wasn't a top, he liked the feel of a man inside him but he prefered putting is cock inside. "FUCK!"

Waves upon waves of different feelings washed over him, he longed to be with someone, have someone to touch him, not just sexually but with feeling, and love. "FUCK!". Reid worked his cock harder and faster, he knew he was getting close but he didn't want it to finish. So he stopped. His chest fell up and down, he could feel his heartbeat pound against his ribcage, he waited for his breathing to slow down, back to its normal rythum before he grabbed his length again.

"Oh god! FUCK...UH UH AHHH" Reid rested one hand on the wall to keep him balanced, he hadn't felt this good in a long time..."Fuck this feel...ahh". He could feel his cock grow harder and harder in his hand as his orgasm grew closer and closer. His panted and panted as he pounded his cock with his own hand..."Fuck...i'm gonna...AHH FUCK! I'M...AHHHHHHHH" Reid's head flew back, his whole body shock as he was over come by one of the hardest orgasms he had in a while. Warm cum shot all up the shower wall, and leaked onto his hand. His legs were so weak they couldn't physcally hold him up and he fell to the floor, struggling to catch his breath. The water splashed onto his face as he looked up. "God i've missed that" He giggled to himself.

A few minutes past, Reid no longer felt dizzy, when he could stand again, he hauld himself up off the floor, and wiped the cum off the walls and turned off the shower.

Reid got out the shower and checked the time "FUCK!" It was quater to 7 already, _how long was I in there?_ He thought. If he didn't get ready, he was going to be late...and in trouble.


	3. First Night As A 'Gay' Man

The night was cold and dark, it was nearly winter, and the sun set early and the night had clear skis, making the night's air like ice to the touch.

Reid, wearing a buttoned up, smart coat, purple scarf, black skinnies and an oversized burgundy knitted cardigan, walked himself to the club. He rubbed his hands together, the cold mist from his hot breath broke through his fingers. He placed his hands into his pockets and hurried along. He was about half a mile away but could see the bright multi-coloured lights booming in the distance, reds, blues, yellows and greens lit up the night sky, the stars above went into hiding.

The music was loud, but not as loud as Reid expected, nearing the club Reid could see it was rather chilled out. People stood about the front chatting away, drinks or cigarettes in hand, how some weren't cold he thought. A man dressed in drag was talking to the bouncer, he wore amazing high, high heels, a purple sparkly dress and a wig which was so tall it nearly hit the top of the door frame. Reid smiled, as much as he was playing a 'Gay' man, he WAS a gay man, and he just felt so comfortable, like he could just be himself. Till he remembered, his entire team were inside, and they'll be watching him.

"Haven't seen you before?" He was a tall built man, tattoos covered in arms and neck, head shiny from the lack of hair, but his voice was soft, which shocked Reid, he comes across as so intimidating, but that's his job. "New to the area, wanted to check out the local bars" Reid smiled at him.

"Well welcome to the Area...?"

"Reid, Spencer Reid" The bouncer had reached out his hand to shake his hand. "Sorry, I don't really like being touched" The bouncer put up his hands. "Sorry man I didn't realise. The names George but everyone round he just calls me G"

"Nice to meet you G" Reid smiled, for just a moment, this didn't feel like his job, he didn't feel like hiding.

"Enjoy yourself tonight" Reid nodded as G gestured for him to go inside. The club was rather quite, Reid preferred that, better than having some drunken up gay guy try and grope on the dance floor. Reid saw his team sat at one of the booths opposite the bar, all dressed up, they were undercover to when Reid thought about it.

People in groups sat in the booths based all around, people danced on the dance floor, a stage stood at the back of the club, which looked like an act would be on soon, and people stood chatting and flirting at the bar. Gays, lesbians, Trans and drag queens, all smiling, laughing, making out and just being themselves. Reid had never been to anything like this before, it was completely different to his local back home, and it felt fresh. He couldn't help but smile, he felt beyond happy, but he wasn't here to have fun, but to work.

He walked to an empty space at the bar, he took off his coat and scarf and placed it on the back on the chair next to him, he took and seat and ordered a drink. "What can I get you handsome?" A tall thin man who's hair was dyed a pastel pink placed messily on the top of his head in some kind of man bun, he had a glass and towel in hand. "Vodka and coke please".

"Coming up" Reid looked behind him at his team, he gave a slight nod to show he had noticed them before turning back around. He slyly placed the ear piece in his ear and turned it on. "If you can hear me Reid, take a sip of your drink, then place it down to your left" Hotch spoke over the microphone quietly. Reid did so. "Good he can hear us, now we just have to wait".

The night went on and the team all engulfed in conversation with Reid over the ear piece, Reid couldn't reply obviously but he would listen in and giggle to himself now and then. Some would look at him weirdly, but he didn't really take much notice, he was to buys checking out the local eye candy.

"See that guy at the bar?" A man's voice came from the booth next to the team.

"Which one?" a different voice came this time, replying.

"The one stood alone, tall, skinny, brown long hair?"

"Oh yeah I see him"

"He's fucking gorgeous" The team could hear the pair talking perfectly, they all began to snigger as they knew that they were on about Reid. "God, his ass though! mmm-mmm I'd definitely wouldn't mind him between my legs" Emily, JJ and Penelope were trying so hard not to laugh, they never imagined hearing someone talk so dirty about their little Spencer. Whereas the mean felt a bit more uncomfortable, as much as they didn't have anything against gay's, those words being said about their fellow team mate made them feel a bit odd.

"Mitsuki, he's you're type, go talk to him..."

"What! No way!"

"Oh why not?" His friend nudged him ever so slightly.

"Sam I don't want to"

"But he's fucking beautiful, I mean he is like a god, and I bet you he's a fucking god in bed too" Sam winked. The girls at this point were nearly wetting themselves, the guys were starting to find it all funny, and had a little giggle alongside the girls.

"Exactly, he's way out of my league"

"You never know if you don't try"

"Maybe, I'll think about it" Mitsuki, the guys named seemed to him, couldn't take his eyes of Reid, looking him up and down, drawing his body with his eyes..."T or B?"

"Huh?" Mitsuki replied.

"Top or bottom...?"

"Oh" Mitsuki giggled. "Umm Bottom, he looks the type. Cute and innocent with a dark secret" The pair laughed.

"You think?" they both stared at him. The other two men who were sat with them, were too busy locking lips to even acknowledge what they were going on about. "What on earth is top or bottom?" Morgan looked so confused. At this point, the teamed and turned off their microphones so Reid couldn't hear them talking amongst themselves. They all laughed at Morgan's question. "What?" Morgan was now, even more confused.

"How do you not know?"

"Why would I? Is it like with guys and girls? Whether they like to sit on the guy or lie underneath him?" Laughter broke out amongst them all again. "Come on guys" Morgan wasn't getting pissed off, but more frustrated as they laughed at him instead of explaining what it meant. "I'll break it down for you sweet pea" Garcia was the first to talk. "When two guys have sex, what do they both have in common?"

"Dicks?"

"Right, and when a guy and a girl have sex, only one gets penetrated..."

"Right..." Morgan nodded slowly. The team all leaned in, listening with big smiles stretched across their faces. "Get it yet?"

"What? No!"

"Oh my god! You might be sexy and very good looking but you can be a little bit slow at some points Hun" He frowned. "Top or bottom literally means who's penetrating who...who's getting the dick up the arse..."

"OH WHAT THE FUCK!" That was it, they all, beside Morgan cracked up in a huge roar of laughter, people were staring at them, and laughing to themselves also, Reid also turned round to see what was going on. "Why, why would they do that?"

"Well they do you fuck the girl and not the other way round?"

"Uhh, because I have the tools too"

"It's same with them, but they both have the tools to do so. Some like to give, others like to receive and others like both"

"OH MY GOD! LOOK HE'S BLOODY GORGOUES" It was the two guys again, Reid had obviously turned around to see the commotion and they got a look at his face. "You HAVE to go talk to him now..."

"Nah, not happening, like he would go for me..."

"Dude, you never know if you don't try..."

"He might not even like Asian men..."

"I swear to god, if you don't up and talk to him this second, I will tell you're whole family you're gay..."

"That's just harsh..."

"Angry Asian mum, Mrs Nakamura...would pay to see that any day" He laughed.

"Fine, I'll other him a drink...okay?" Mitsuki got up, and the team got there first look at him, he was tall, like Reid and had long hair too, but his was jet black, he wore black skinny jeans, ripped at the knees, combat boots, a long ripped grey t-shirt, which sat just above his knees and a long, oversized knitted cardigan. "He's the Asian version of Reid" JJ said. "He's actually really good looking"

They all followed him as he slowly approached Reid. He Reached the bar and stood awkwardly next him to him, for about 2 minutes he didn't even look at him, but he took and deep breath and turned to him. "Umm hey, umm..." Spencer turned to look at him, he had the most beautiful brown eyes, Mitsuki thought, his jaw dropped. Reid's hair was all messy and matted, but looked good. He smiled at him. "Hi" Reid said awkwardly, Reid didn't really know what to do when people approached him at a bar. "Can I get you a drink?" Mitsuki asked.

"Sure" Reid smiled "Vodka and coke please" Mitsuki smiled back and he turned to the barman. "Levi, 2 double vodka and cokes please"

"Anything for you sexy" the barman winked.

"So um, you new? Haven't seen you here before..." The barman laid down their drinks, Spencer picked his up and took a sip threw the bright pink straw and nodded. "Yeah, moved into the new apartments down the road yesterday" He said as he took another sip of his drink.

"Oh really, I'm not from round here myself, I live in Virginia" Reid's eyes widened, not only was the man in front of him completely drop dead gorgeous but he lived in the same area as him. But he couldn't tell him that just in case the unsub took a liking to Reid. "Oh really, I just moved from there"

"What's your name?"

"Spencer, Spencer Reid"

"Nice to meet you Spencer, I'm Mitsuki Nakamura" They shook hands and smiled at one another. The team all watched as Reid was being chatted up, they didn't really know what to do, it was kind of obvious something like this would happen, and they need it to happen for the unsub to take an interest into Reid. "Have you ever thought?" Emily said.

"Thought what" Replied JJ.

"That Reid could actually be gay..." The team all looked at her. "Well, you never see him with a girl, talk to a girl or even look at a girl. Nor date a girl" They team all sat there and thought.

"He would have said something to us?" Morgan said. "Especially me, I mean were like brothers, he tells me everything"

"But what if he didn't want us to know? Maybe he's worried on what we may think of him?"

"Nah, Reid's not gay, he kissed Lyla remember..."

"Yeah but, that doesn't mean anything Morgan" They all look back at Reid and Mitsuki who have gotten a lot closer since they lasted looked at them. "So what do you do Spencer?"

"I work in a bookshop a few miles from here, what about you?"

"Oh, I actually work for my local police department, I'm a newbie, not long moved here from Japan"

"Japan? You're English is really good...um i hope you don't mind me saying" Mitsuki laughed.

"Not at all, I had a friend back in Japan, born here in New York, he taught me a lot. Do you know any Japanese?" he asked.

"Fluently" Reid smiled.

"Really? Have you been to Japan?"

"No, I just liked the language and learnt it, didn't take me long really, maybe a few months" Reid smiled as he took a sip on his drink. "A few months?" Mitsuki looked shocked but also impressed. "Are you some kind of genius?" Reid nodded.

"I have an eidetic memory, can read 20,000 words per minute and have an I.Q of 187" Mitsuki didn't really know what to say to that. "Did you know it takes a person roughly 5 years to learn a new language, 3 years of living in that said country to pick up the accent and 10 to sound completely native" Reid smiled awkwardly as Mitsuki just stared at him, not saying anything. "I'm sorry, I ummm I talk a lot, I don't really know when to stop" But Mitsuki just laughed.

"It's cute" Reid and Mitsuki both smiled at each other. Mitsuki reached into his pocket a pulled out a packet of smokes, "Did you want one?"

"Oh please, haven't had one all evening" Reid had completely forgotten that his team mates sat behind him as he placed the cigarette between his lips.

"Did you know Reid smoked?" Hotch aimed the question at everybody. But they all said no.

The night gotten on, less and less people were at the bar, but Reid and Mitsuki were still talking, laughing, drinking and smoking. The team kept an eye on them two but at the same time would look around the room to see if they spot anyone they think to be or look suspicious. The bar was closing in 10 minutes, and nothing had happened so far, so Hotch turned his microphone back on. "Reid, it's closing in 10, were heading out, leave when it's shut" Reid coughed to show he understood.

They team all stood up and headed for the exit. The night was colder than it was before, cars frosted over, ice laid on the concrete. "Right, let's get into the car, warm up and keep watch" They nodded in response and headed to the black SUV parked about 15 metre from the club.

Just 10 minutes later, as suspected, Reid and Mitsuki emerged from the door. "Nice to meet you Spencer, you coming back?" It was George the bouncer. Reid stopped and spoke to him for a little while, he seemed to know Mitsuki pretty well, so he must be a regular himself. "See you later G" Spencer said as they walked down the steps. They stopped as they neared the cars. "Cigarette?"

"Yeah, go on then, but I really must be off soon"

"That's fine, just another excuse to talk to you longer" Reid blushed, he liked Mitsuki, he was really good looking, smart, funny and they shared similar interests. It was nice to talk to someone other than his team mates for a change, it was nice to flirt and have fun, and it had been a while. The pair, spoke and smoked from another 15 minutes before they said their goodbyes. "So will I see you again Spence?" No one called him that other than JJ, and he liked it. "Umm, Maybe" He left out a cute little laugh as he smiled.

"Well, I'm working here tomorrow night, if you wanted to maybe meet me?"

"I'd like that" Reid couldn't help but smile.

"Here, have these" Mitsuki handed him a fresh packet off cigarette's which only had two missing out of it. "Tomorrow you can give me a smoke instead" Reid smiled, but before he could say goodbye, he was hit with a shock. Mitsuki had lend in and pressed his lips against Reid's.

Reid was taken back, his eyes wide, but then he realised, that this was who he was. He slowly closed his eyes and took in Mitsuki, feeling his soft, warm lips pressed against his. He wrapped one arm around his waist and lifted his hand to his cheek. It was cold to the touch, Reid's warm handmade Mitsuki flinch. The kiss became more passionate and they move in perfect harmony with one another. Reid could feel his heart beat at a hundred miles an hour, he'd never felt like this around someone before, especially not on the first meeting.

...Then he remember, in the cars not far from him was his team mates. Reid pulled away hastily. "I'm sorry, I didn't..."

"It's not you, I'm just, I haven't actually come out yet and just shocked me that was all, and I'm worried someone will see me"

"Oh I'm sorry...I just, I couldn't help it" He bowed his head, hair fell covering his face. Reid took his hand a placed it under his chin, bring his face up to his level. "Didn't say I didn't like it" Spencer winked. Moments later they departed. Reid went one way as Mitsuki went the other, smiled slapped across their faces.

"Did Reid...did they just kiss" The team all said gauping, jaws dropped.

"Uh-huh" Everyone was in complete shock. Reid was taking his role really seriously.


	4. It's Complicated

**Hi guys,**

 **Sorry it has taken so long for me to upload a new chapter, but I have been so busy with college lately getting ready for University. I do apologise, but here is something i whipped up tonight, I hope it's okay. Thank you to everyone who reads and enjoys my stories. Love yu guys!**

"Did they..just..." Everyone nodding in unison, mouths gaping. In complete shock, they watched as their team mate finished talking to the young man.

Reid gave Mitsuki a hug goodbye and they parted ways. Reid couldn't stop smiling, his whole body tingled with the rise of goosebumps, no one had made him felt like this, ever. Reid has had a few different partners other the years, but nothing this special, nothing that made him feel weak at the knees, nothing that made him feel as if he had a hundred butterflies in his stomach.

But how he is feeling right now, he has to hide them from his team otherwise they would definitely get suspiscious. Especially if he got in the car smiling like a little school boy right after he had been kissed by Mitsuki.

He could see the black 4x4 sat underneath a streetlight, the black had become more of a orangey glow. Reid popped open the door and everyone just stared at him as he climbed in. "What on earth was that?" Garcia asked, sounding more excited then shocked.

"What was what?" Reid knew exactly what she was going on about, he didn't know why he didn't say he knew, he just panicked. "That kiss...with that...guy?"

"Well you said I had to be convincing, and when he kissed me, if I had pulled away straight away, if the unsub was watching than he'd know I wasn't really gay" Reid said whilst raising his fingers into the quotion gesture, looking at Garcia, almost starring through her.

"So, did you enjoy it?" Emily said, sat right next to him.

"What? No! Cause I didn't" Emily had her eyebrow raised.

"Are you sure? Because it kinda looked as if you enjoyed it..."

"What the hell Emily, I'm not gay!" Reid said on the attack.

"Chill man, were just having a laugh with you that's all...why so on the defensive? Sure you're not trying to hide anything from us? Like maybe you ARE gay?" Morgan laughed but Reid didn't looked amused what so ever, from what he thought would end as a good night, turned into a shit one. "Fuck sake Morgan, I'm not a fucking fag!" Everyone was taken back by Reid's choice in words, never would they imagine that such language would come out of Reid's mouth. "Clearly" Spoke Morgan.

The Team all headed back to the appartments, Reid went off first, Morgan had really ticked him off this time. Not even saying goodbye, Reid opened then slamed his appartment door shut. "Do you think he's mad?" Morgan asked, JJ slapped him hard across the back off his head.

"OUCH!" Morgan placed his hand against the back of his sore head. "What was that for?"

"It's you're fault the kids upset, you can't keep winding him up like that, otherwise one day he's gonna flip and clout you one across the face" JJ wasn't happy, poor Reid always got picked on, or made fun off. Sometimes she joins in and has a laugh but only when she knows it isn't hurting the kid, but others take it too far and this happens. "He shouldn't take things to heart" Hotch unlocks the door and they all go in. Only Hotch and Morgan are staying the the apartment, where as the others are staying in the hotel next door.

"What on earth is all this?" Emily was shocked, 5 comupter screens all set up from camera's dotted around Reid's room. "Are you spying on him?" Everyone looked at the pair.

"It's more for his safety"

"So that's a yes" The girls were not impressed, if Reid knew about this, he would blame everyone. "It's both. We need to keep an eye on the main entries into the appartment just incase he does take a liking to Reid, and the other..."

"What?"

"I think he maybe using again" Hotch said.

"What? Dauladid?" Hotch nodded in response. "But why? He wouldn't"

"He's been off lately. Late to work, looking as if he hadn't slept or more than one occasion and so on"

"Have you thought maybe he got himself a girlfriend?" Asked JJ.

"Or boyfriend..."

"MORGAN!" JJ shouted. "ENOUGH!" Morgan was taken back by JJ sudden outburst, so much that he kept quite. "Cause I never thought of that, Reid isn't the dating kind"

"But he's the drug taking kind?" JJ was turning into mummy bear, and didn't like what Hotch was suggesting, he would have told her.

"That's not what I meant JJ"

"Then what did you mean Hotch? You are literally spying on Spence to see whether or not he is using drugs again..." JJ was getting more and more fustrated, and if she didn't leave now, then she would say something she would regret. "Take them out"

"We can't...as much as we are spying, we are just keeping an eye on him. We care about him as much as you do JJ, we're just trying to look out for him" Hotch said. "Look, I did originally put the cameras in place because of the Unsub, he liked to strike in peoples homes, and if Reid caught his attention, then Reid could be next. It wasn't until the day we came here that I realised we could keep and eye on him and see why he's been acting up" JJ looked at Hotch thinking that what he said did make sense, if anything were to happen to Reid then she could never forgive herself. "Fine, but he's not some reality tv star, don't just sit and watch him 24/7" Hotch nodded.

The team all jumped, a loud bang came from the computer screens, they all turn to look and see Reid in the living room, everything was in a mess. Books dotted around on the floor, paperwork everywhere. Reid was stood in the center of it all, breathing heavily, chesting rising and falling as his heart pounded against his ribcage. "What on earth" The team all watch him. Reid picks up another book and aims it at the wall, with a loud thud the book burst open and fell to the floor. Reid dropped to his knees, all the team could hear now, was the sound of snifferling, he was crying. The team didn't know what to do, they couldn't go in there, not when he is like this, he would wonder how they knew he was upset and question them. So they just carried on watching.

Reid was sat on the floor, books, paper, clothes spread out all across the floor, he, in the middle of it. His face was wet and sticky from the tears, his eyes swollen red and his knuckles were red raw from where he clearly had punch a wall or door a few times. He needed to calm down, he needed a fix, but he was clean, he couldn't go through all that again. Then he rememebered, Reid stood up and looked for his coat that he had been wearing that night. It laid on the floor next to the door, he picked it up and pulled out the packet of cigerattes that Mitsuki had given him earlier that eveing. He opened the small cardboard box and pulled one out, but when he did, a small piece of paper came out with it. He picked it up off the floor and read the contents.

"555-0125 Call me x"

Reid smiled, he was driving himself crazy as he had forgotten to take Mitsuki's number. ' _So that's why he gave him the packet of cigerattes'_ Reid thought to himself. He slid the note into his pocket of his trousers, and took his lighter and phone out of his coat and headed to the balcony.

The air was crisp and cold, it stung has it hit his bear skin but he didn't care, it felt nice to have a smoke, it helped calm him down, a lot.

"What was that? Rewind it" Penelope did as Emily asked. "Stop! There" Emily pointed to the screen, where Reid was holding a piece of white paper. "Is that a note?"

"It looks like it, thing is we can't get a good view on it" Penelope did try to zoom in but the camera's weren't the best and the picture became blurry. "What ever it is, it seemed to have calmed him down".

"Do we have a balcony too?" Morgan asked Hotch.

"Yeah why?"

"Reid's out there...he pulled his phone out, I want to know who he is phoning"

"Really Morgan? Just leave him alone, it's bad enough you are spying on him, now you want to listen into his phone calls too..." JJ folded her arms over her chest, she was getting really tiered of Morgan. "Well don't come then JJ, but for all we know he could be calling a dealer or something?" Morgan himself knew that to be very unlikely but he was curious to see what the boy was doing, some part of him was worried the other half was a little nosey.

Morgan walks to where Hotch pointed that the balcony was, he slowly unlocked it and pulled the door open as quitely as he can. Luckly the door was a sliddling side to side one, so Reid wouldn't notice if it was open or not. Morgan, Hotch and Emily all stood by the door, soon JJ and Penelope gave in and walked over.

"Oh hi, umm I found you're number" Reid voice was shakey, the team couldn't work out whether it was becuase it was bloody freezing outside or he was nervous.

"Haha yeah, I um, just wanted to say thanks" Who was Reid talking too? the Team couldn't work it out, they could only hear Reid's voice. "Yeah, um it's complicated". Reid sparked up his cigeratte, the team found it weird watching the young agent smoke. "I wish I could tell you, maybe soon"

"What is he on about?" JJ asked, everyone just shrugged their shoulders.

"What, no it's not that. It's complicated" Reid continued. "What, no! I had a great time tonight"

"Is he talking to that Mitsuki guy?" Asked Morgan.

"I had a laugh, just my night ended on a bad one that was all. What? No, why friends were just being dicks"

"Did he just calls us dicks?" Morgan was slightly offened by this.

"You Morgan, you were the one being a dick" Spoke JJ, she was still mad about ealier on, and she wanted Derek to know about it. "As I said it was a long story and I'll explain, but I can't at the moment" Reid stubbed out his cigerette and lent over the ledge of the balcony.

"No it's nothing bad" Reid laughed. "What? Haha no, really? You thought that? I'm flattered" Reid was definitly in a better mood to what he was in earlier, the team were all slightly puzzled to how one moment he was on the floor in tears, with a trashed up apartment, to laughing down the phone to a guy he just met. "Yeah, I'm definitly still up for tomorrow if you are. I was planning on going to the club tomorrow anyway" Reid nodded his head, clearly agreeing with something.

"What time you getting off? Ahh okay, well I will be heading there for about 8ish, so I better get a free drink" Reid laughed.

"Is he flirting?" Emily was puzzled, they all were, either he was still playing the part because he was on the phone to this guy, or he really maybe gay. They team didn't really know what to think, but either way Reid was smiling, and they hadn't seen him smile in weeks. "What time you off?...Okay, well I am looking forward to it...Yeah, goodnight to you too, see you tomorrow, bye, bye" Reid hung up, placing his phone back into his pocket and headed back inside. But before he went completely out of sight, they team saw something. Being profilers they know the difference between different facial expressions and this wasn't a normal smile, only one side was raised, almost like a smirk, but it had more feeling to it. If the team only knew that he truly was gay, they would have realised that Reid could possibly be falling for this guy.


	5. The Unsub

Reid woke to the sound of his alarm, smacking it off the bedside table. That was the first night in a long time Reid was able to sleep all the way through. The last time that happened Reid was high of his nut on drugs.

He managed to pull himself from underneath the covers and drag himself to the bathroom, picking up his towel on the way. The hot water bounced on Reid white pale skin, running down every bump and curve, Reid, tracing the running water with his fingers. He never truly liked his body, they lack of muscle and fat. Everyone always moaned at him for being so skinny, telling to put on weight, but as much as Reid hated it, he didn't mind it. His fingers found their way to his arm, were he could feel every bad memory, every regret, every sad moment he has felt. The handmade scars from when he was an 11 year old college student right up until his 2nd year of being an FBI agent, despite only being a year since his last slip, they were still raised and purple. And the scars from when the drug entered his veins. This was the part of his body he despised, the part he wish never existed.

His team knew of his drug problems, it wasn't exactly hard to hide, he was coming into work fucked nearly every day. But not once did they offer him any help, he had to fight alone. Reid was fine with that, as much as he wanted someone he always felt a burden to them, and for the cut scars, no one knew about them, beside maybe JJ who saw his fresh marks in the first year. He was heading out for lunch with her when he dropped all his files on the floor, the pair bend down to collect them up and as Reid reached for one his shirt cuff slipped up revealing the fresh red line carved into his skin. He noticed immediately, pulling his sleeve down before JJ could see anything, but it was too late, she was already looking at him with sad eyes. But she never asked why, or when, just gave him a hug and a loving smile, and that was enough for Reid.

Reid was stood in the shower long enough that the water had gotten cold, but he didn't notice until he snapped out of his daydream. He released his arm from his tight grip, not releasing he was doing so, turned off the shower and walked out. His towel had be sat on the radiator so was nice and warm. He draped it around his waist and headed into the bedroom.

In the other room, Morgan was up, dressed and sat at the table with a coffee in hand. Hotch walked out of the bathroom fully suited and booted, black suite, dark red tie and boring black boots. "Coffee?" Morgan offered.

"Please" Hotch sat down at the computer screens and switched them on. Morgan walked over towards him and handed him his coffee before sitting down in the chair next to him. "Do you think the kid will be alright?"

"What makes you say that?" Hotch took a sip of his drink and looked at Morgan.

"It's juts, with all the kid has been through this past year, do you think it wise he go undercover? I mean, anything could happen to him"

"Morgan, if Reid didn't think he could handle it he wouldn't be here and I certainly wouldn't put him out in the field if I didn't think he was ready"

"Maybe you're right Hotch but still he's still young, everything that has happened to him and only being 24, it's just not fair"

"Life's not fair Morgan it's how we make it" Morgan gave Hotch a little smile and looked back at the computer screens. They both watched as Reid left the bathroom, they still didn't feel right watching the kid but they had to take measures. Hotch had already looked at the footage from the night before making sure everything was good, which it was.

Reid grabbed his phone from the bed side table and sat on the edge of the bed. 1 new message. He opened it and smiled, it was from Mitsuki.

 _"_ _Hey Beautiful, can't wait for tonight_ _J_ _is it weird to say I couldn't stop thinking about you last night? Anyway give me a ring when you can, need to ask you something xx"_

Reid definitely couldn't help but smile now, Mitsuki was just beautiful in every way possible, Reid couldn't believe he could feel like this again, feel this happy. _But what is it he wants to ask me?_ Reid thought. He pressed the phone to his ear and wait nervously, they phone rang and rang and eventually went to voice mail, he sighed and just put the phone down on the bed, he got up to get dressed but then the phone rang, _Mitsuki_.

"Hello"

"Oh hello" Reid said nervously.

"You okay?"

"I'm good, yourself?" Reid smile was wide and proud, he was just happy Mitsuki wasn't there to see how stupid he looked.

"I'm okay, just tiered. You still coming tonight?"

"Yeah definitely, can't wait"

"Me neither, I'm actually not working anymore, they didn't need me in the end, so you have me all to yourself" Even though Reid couldn't see him, he could almost feel Mitsuki's excitement. "Oh that's good"

"Spence, everything okay?"

"Yeah why?"

"You just, I don't know, sound weird…not in a rude way or anything, just you don't seem like how you did last night, You are still interested right?" Mitsuki was worried even to ask that, he liked Reid, he liked him a lot but it seems every man that he like either cheats on him or leaves. "Cause, it's just I'm nervous"

"Why?"

"Because, I just, I haven't done anything like this in a long time. Of course I'm still interested, I mean I'm surprised you haven't lost interest in me yet, I'm not exactly the most exciting person in the world" Reid sniggered.

"I don't think I could ever lose interest in you Spencer Reid" Reid smiled. "You're not like other men I've met, I've known you less the 24 hours but I feel like I've known you a life time…plus you're fucking gorgeous" They both laughed.

"Funny, I looked like some teaching assistant with a bad haircut" Mitsuki laughed.

"Nothing wrong with that, it's cute. Like a really bad gay teacher porno" Reid didn't quite get it but he laughed anyway. It had been nearly half an hour before either of them wanted to hang up. "I'll see you tonight then Spence?"

"Yeah defiantly, 8?"

"I can't wait" Reid was just about to hang up before he heard Mitsuki call his name.

"Spence I forgot to ask, what you doing this Friday night?"

"I don't know, why?"

"Would you go on a date with me?" Reid couldn't help smile, Mitsuki was beautiful, amazing and just perfect, at this point he didn't care what he team thought, he was happy. "Spence? Spence you there?"

"Yeah, sorry. I would love to"

"Okay great, I'll text you the when and where?"

"Sure. I'll see you tonight, bye" A faint goodbye could be heard and Reid put down the phone.

"What's the young doctor up to this morning?" Morgan and Hotch watched as Reid sat on the edge of the bed with his phone to his head. _"Oh Hello"_ Spoke Reid.

"Who's he on the phone too?" Hotch just shrugged. The pair watched the young doctor laugh and flirt to whomever was at the end of the phone. "Funny, I looked like some teaching assistant with a bad haircut" Reid smiled.

"Seriously who is he talking to?"

"Does it matter? We're not here in pry into his conversations Morgan"

"Oh come on Hotch, not like you're not a slightest bit curious"

"Of course I am but I don't let that get the better of me" Morgan signed and sipped his coffee and carried on watching the boy. Hotch noticed something, he zoomed into the Reid, and bowed his head. "Did you know about this?" Morgan shock his head, he knew exactly what Hotch was on about, the red scars trailing Reid's arm. "How did we not notice?"

"Because he knows how to hide it" Hotch Replied.

"How is it we always miss when the kid needs us the most? Some family we're meant to be"

"Don't beat yourself up Morgan, the kid is not only a profiler but a genius as well, unless we catch it by a simple slip up or watch him get naked in front of us, then we would never had noticed it"

"Yeah, I guess, but we can't even ask him about it because then he'll ask how we found out and it's not like we can turn to him and tell him we have been secretly spying on him with cameras, can we?" Hotch shock his head.

"We just have to wait for him to come to us".

Reid walked towards the dresser letting his towel fall to the floor, taking out a pair of clean boxer shorts, putting them on then a pair of socks and trousers. He took his watch from off the top and slipped it onto his wrist. "Shit!" It was nearly 9 and Reid is meant to be down at the station for 10. He finished getting himself ready, grabbed his messenger bag from the floor in the sitting room, his keys and headed out the door.

"I really didn't want to see that" Morgan said wide eyed at the computer screen, Hotch having the same expression. "Wow, who knew Reid was carrying so" Hotch looked at Morgan in almost disgust.

 **19:55**

Reid was slightly early, so he stood outside in the multitude of lights and lit up a cigarette. The team were all still set in the car, watching to see if anyone is curious or interested in Reid, but so far, nothing. Reid carried on smoking his cigarette when he felt someone's hands on his hips, making him jump. "Shit, sorry man didn't men to startle you" It was Mitsuki. His hair was all raggity as if he had only run his hands through it instead of a brush, very much like Reid's. He was wearing a long black coat, similar to Reid's. Dark grey skinnies and combat boots. Reid looked at him thinking about how hot he looked, wanting him. Mitsuki gave Reid a hug and a smell kiss on the lips, lucky Spencer's back was turned, and he hoped he team mates didn't see. "Shell we go on it?" Reid nodded and they both headed indoors.

The club was pretty quiet, only a handful of people at the bar, no one on the dance floors and the other people that were here all sat at the tables or in booths. "What do you want for drink?" Reid asked.

"Double vodka and coke"

"Make that turn" Reid turned to the bartender. "How have you been?"

"Good, felt lonely last night though" Reid just looked at him blankly. "Oh god, that was embarrassing" Mitsuki took a huge gulp of his drink, in panic. Reid put his hand round the glass and slowly pulled it away from his mouth. "It was cute" He smiled.

The Team had found themselves a table behind the boys, in perfect view of the entire club. Rossi and Penelope were back at Morgan and Hotch's room keeping an eye on Reid's apartment, making sure everything was all good whilst they were away.

"Thanks" Mitsuki giggled as he moved closer to Reid. "Just, I haven't done this in a while and I just seem to keep coming out with weird things"

"Don't worry about it, I haven't either. Last time I went on a date I was back in Uni"

"Wait, how old are you?"

"24"

"And you've already been to university?" Reid nodded.

"3 PHD's" Mitsuki looked shocked, he knew Reid was young but he never knew that he had gone to university. "Wow, I knew you were a genius but…" They laughed together as they sipped there drinks.

It was nearing midnight, 4 double and cokes each, some random shoots later, they pair were slightly drunk. Over the course of the night they had slowly gotten closer and closer, at this point Mitsuki's arm was around Reid's waist and Reid had his head propped up arm as he lent on the bar. He was watching Mitsuki's every move, he was fixated on him, hooked, like a drug. He wanted him, god did he want him. Reid was too drunk to realise who was watching him and who wasn't. Reid lifted himself up and pulled Mitsuki in, close enough he could feel Mitsuki's warm breath against his face. "Spence?" Reid placed his hand on the side on Mitsuki's face and pulled him in, his lips on his. Mitsuki's body went limp with excitement, he had wanted this all night, he had wanted this since they last kissed. He wrapped his other arm around his waist and crashed their bodies together. A small moan escaped Reid's lips but not quite enough that Mitsuki heard it and smiled. He bite Spencer's bottom lip causing him to moan again and open, he took this opportunity and put his tongue in Reid's. They bodies moved together in perfect harmony, not giving a care in the word, crashing their lips together, making every movement more passionate then the last. The kiss lasted only a 1minute or so but to them it felt like much longer. Reid was first to pull away, a smiled was replaced on his lips. "WOW!" Mitsuki said as he slowly opened his eyes to look at Reid. "Never expected that" He giggled.

"Sorry too much?" Reid asked, he panicked and moved away.

"What? No, no. Not at all, just took me by surprise. Payback for last night I guess" Mitsuki smiled as he looked at Reid.

Reid pulled Mitsuki in for a kiss, crashing their lips together. The team watched every movement, every change in body language, they watched as they male team mate kissed another man. "Everyone else seeing this right?" Spoke Emily.

"JJ you definite Reid isn't gay?"

"I, I don't know" JJ was just as confused as the rest of them, when they questioned him last time, with his choice of language, they thought that they were thinking too much into it, but this time, they didn't know what to think, there team mate voluntarily kissed another man, and not a quick peck on the lips and full blown make out session. "Okay I'm just confused now" As they watched their friend talk, they looked around for any response, as just as they were about the give up, at the end of a bar a man probably early to mid-40's sat staring at the pair.

He watched their every move, not losing eye contact. His hand was clenched into a fist so hard his knuckles began turning white. You could see the anger in his face, the total disgust, if he was homophobic why would he be in an openly gay bar? They team carried on watching him watch Reid, he flinched every time the pair got closer, never relaxing his fist. "You all see him right?" They all nodded. Hotch told Morgan and JJ took pose for a photo in front of the possible unsub. Hotch quickly snapped a shot making sure they could see the unsub clearly.

It was 1am, Mitsuki and Reid were outside having a cigarette chatting away. They didn't really want to depart, Mitsuki invited Reid back to his place but had to sadly refuse, as much as Reid would do anything to be between his legs, he couldn't. Mitsuki looked upset about the rejection but understood. "I'll call you?" Mitsuki asked, wording it like a question.

"Can't wait" Reid smiled and kissed him goodbye, walking their separate ways.

Reid's apartment was dark and cold, alcohol still flooded his system, swaying all over the place trying to get his footing. He realised that maybe getting drunk on a job wasn't the best plan. He made his way through the darkness until he found his bed. Not bothering to take off his clothes, he just fell onto the bed and was taken by sleep.

A few hours passed and Reid was still out cold on his bed, it was still pitch black inside and outside. A figure loomed in the darkness, standing tall in the corner of his bedroom. He stepped out into the moonlight, the only bit of light coming into Reid's room. Only catching a glimpse of half his face and body, he watched as Reid slept. "Peccator".


	6. Who are you Spencer Reid?

There was a knock at the door, Hotch was in the shower so Morgan headed over. He opened the door only to be expecting the kid but there was no one there. Morgan popped his head out of the doorway and looked up and down the hallways, but to only see no one. He was just about to shut the door when he noticed something small and white on the floor. It was an envelope.

Morgan bends down to pick it up, turning it hand. He looks for a name but nothing, so he just opens it. Morgan's eyes widened as he looked at the content, a photo of the young agent, asleep in bed, in the room next door. Morgan runs out into the hallway and down towards the exit, leaving the apartment door wide open, leaving a very confused Hotch, who at that moment leaves the bathroom.

Morgan runs down the stairs, and into the lobby, he looks around but see's no one. "Shit!".

"What was that about?" Morgan returns to the bedroom, Hotch now dressed in his usual black suite and tie. Morgan hands Hotch the envelope, Hotch giving the same impression. "Wait, Hotch...what's on the back?" Hotch turns the image over reading. "Preccator".

"What the hell does that mean?" asked Morgan.

"Sinner".

"Hotch, why are we all at the precinct?" The team all walked into a room that they are perfectly familiar with.

"We have been compromised" Everyone looked at one another.

"What do you mean?" Asked JJ.

"This morning me and Morgan received this..." The photo of Reid turned up on everyone's tablets.

"Is that Spence...asleep?" Questioned JJ. Hotch nodded.

"It seems our Unsub managed to break into his apartment last night, but how he figured out who we are..." Hotch was hoping for a response from the others, but like him, no one else could think. Reid was unaware of all this, Hotch told him to stay at the apartment and he'll call if he's needed. "Have you checked the camera's?" Emily spoke.

"Not yet, I wanted to talk to you all first, I have Garcia currently running through the footage back at the apartment, and also keeping an eye on Reid, make sure he doesn't come

back"

"But how did he know who we are?"

"But we don't know if he actually does" Morgan looked puzzled. "I mean, he didn't call us cops or FBI, he just left us a photo of Reid. For all we know he doesn't actually know who or what we are, and I plan on keeping it that way"

Reid was wondering his apartment wondering what on earth everyone was up too and why he was left in the dark. He picked up his packet of smokes off the coffee table, as well as his phone and headed over to the patio. The moment Reid opens the doors, he felt the winter air hit him arm, his hairs on his arms stood tall like soldiers, his warm breathing creating a white cloud. HIs whole body shivered, he opened the packet of cigarettes pulled out the lighter and a smoke, and placed it between his lips. His hands shook as he tried to spark up, finally a warm orangey light hit the end of his knows. He took in a big lung full and breathed out, releasing the toxic crap.

Reid watched people as people walked past, couples, families, owners and there pets. Before he would have just seen them as normal people but now, he questions whether or not they could be a killer, or could become one. This job has not only made Reid's life dangerous, it has changed the way he see's people, always watching, profiling.  
He lent himself against the metal railings, that was between him, and a nasty fall. Reid stubbed his cigarette out in the ashtray next to him, but stayed where he was. He wanted to watch the people more, he missed being kind of normal, but he wouldn't change who or what he had become for nothing. Reid's phone vibrated in his pocket, it was Mitsuki, he was ringing. He pressed the green button and placed it to his ear. "Hello" Reid said with a smile.

"Moshi, Moshi" Replied Mitsuki.

"How are you?"

"I'm good...sorry Reid I'm not here for a conversation" Reid was taken back by what he had said, had he done something wrong? Pissed him off? Reid panicked a little. "Ooh, okay...have I done something wrong?"

"What...no, It's just..." Mitsuki sounded worried, his voice shaking and quite, he was breathing rather heavily down the phone as if he had been running.

"Mitsuki, what's wrong?" Reid was panicking now, worried something was wrong with him. It had only been a couple of days but Reid had grown to care for Mitsuki, a lot. Thinking about him nearly all the time, making sure he's okay by texting and calling, he felt almost responsible for him, and he liked it. "Have you noticed anything weird like, last night?"

"You talking about the kiss?"

"What, no...I rather enjoyed that" Mitsuki giggled a little. "No, last night, when you got home...did anything feel not quit right?" Reid was more and more worried now.

"What are you going on about Mitsuki, you're worrying me"

"Can I come over?"

"You want to come over...?"

"Please, I need to show you something and I can't do that over the phone..."

"I don't know Mitsuki, It's not because I don't want you over but I don't know if you're able too" Reid knew himself that, that sounded a little dodgy, he really wanted nothing more then to have him over, to chill, watch movies, chat and have a little fun with. But if Hotch were to find out, he could be in major trouble, that and they would definitely get suspicious. "Reid, if you don't want me to come over then just say so"

"No it's not that, honestly. It's just..." Reid was trying to think of something good and believable. Quickly. "It's just I've only just moved in and everything is in boxes, I want you to come round when it looks nice" Reid smiled to himself, because it was true. "Look, there is a café near me, want to meet there?"

"Yeah sure, you're buying though" Reid laughed.

"Of course, my treat".

"So what do we do?" Everyone was sat at the table in the precinct trying to figure out what to do, Reid was in trouble and he was the Unsub's next target. He is his target. "Look, Reid needs to stay undercover"

"But Hotch, he knows about us" Morgan said.

"But what if doesn't" Everyone looked puzzled at Hotch. "What I mean is as far as we are aware he only sent the image to us, he hasn't seen us with Reid just know that we are watching him. He hasn't mentioned that we're with the FBI, so he doesn't know that much. As for now, Reid is to stay undercover, and we'll carry on as normal, if we make him believe that we've step back because he's worried us then he might keep with Reid. It's the only way to catch him"

"You want to keep Reid in harms way?"

"No JJ that's not what I mean. The Unsub doesn't know were agents, he doesn't know that Reid actually knows us...just knows that we know him. Do I make any sense?" They starred at him blankly.

"The Unsub is onto Reid, we need to see if he trailing him. Maybe we should ask him to ask that Mitsuki guy out for a meal or something, somewhere close to the club?" Morgan suggested. Since that second kiss Morgan has been thinking whether or not Reid has been completely honest with them, he's not trying to wind him up in his typical Morgan kind of fashion, but Reid was hiding something, and this plan could help them try and get an idea on the unsub as well as watching him with the Mitsuki guy. "Sounds like a good idea Morgan. Someone text Reid where and when to go"

"Now...why sinner?"

Reid was getting himself ready to go an meet Mitsuki, he quickly changed out of his pyjama's and into a pair of ripped skinny jeans, oversized grey and black washed knitted cardigan, his purple scarf and coat. his pushed his hair back in between his fingers, brushing it to make himself look less like a raggedy hobo. He grabbed his messenger bag, placed his cigarettes in his pocket and was about to head out the door, when he got a text.

 _ **HOTCH**_

 ** _Reid, change of plans. You are to asked you friend Mitsuki out on a date tonight. Go to Rokurinsha Restaurant at 2448 Abbottsbury Row for 7.30pm._**  
 ** _Reid starred at his phone, puzzled. Why did Hotch want to change his location? He placed his phone back into his pocket and headed out._**

"Sinner...maybe saying that being gay is a sin?" Spoke Rossi.

"That's most likely why, he's targeted nothing but gay men, and to some that as seen as a sin. But that's not much to go by. Was there anything else at the crime scenes?" They all looked through the images, and notes.

"We know he dumps there bodies in alley ways behind or near gay bars, not far from the victims houses. Nothing is missing from them, no DNA traces left on the bodies. All we have is the word sinner"

"We have nothing" Everyone sat, it was the first time in a long time a case got to them so hard, they haven't had a case this hard in a long time. "All we have is the polaroid of Reid, 5 dead bodies and a word. We need him to mess up, we need to set a trap" Hotch said.

"How?"

"We need someone to release a press conference, saying were closing in on the unsub, we know what his aim is and why he's doing what he is doing. Play him at his own game. We need him to mess up...he's wants attention, why would he leave us that photo if he wasn't trying to taunt us" Nodded responses come Hotch's way. "Garcia"

"Yes sir"

"Call the local station and ask for a press conference, JJ you deliver the fact profile, give as much false fact as you can" Hotch headed out of the room. "Deputy Chief Marston could you come here please?"

"Of course, could you finish this up for me Officer Cole"

"Yes sir" Replied Officer Cole.

"What can I do for you fella's and lasses of course"

"We need you to set up a hot line, we need the unsub to call us, were going to be releasing a press conference this evening and we need a hot line for when he phones".

"You have an idea on who it is already?"

"No that is the point of this press conference, he going to play him at his own gain, make him make a mistake" The Deputy Chief nodded, he looked like a friendly man, had a friendly face. Dark brown eyes and silver hair, he was a big man, always smelt of old cigar smoke and whisky. "I do that right away for you, anything else for you?"

"No, thank you" He gave a kind smile and headed out the room. "Let's get to work".

The cafe was only a 10 minute walk from Reid's apartment, the cold air hitting his exposed cheeks, finger tips going red. Reid rubbed his hands together as he walked along the path, the roads are rather quite for this time of day. He reached the little cafe, looked through the window and saw Mitsuki sitting at one of the tables, he smiles and walks in. "I vaigly remember what coffee you like" Mistuki looked up at Reid with a cute smile and eyes shinning, Reid's lips raised in a half smile, he took a seat oppisite Mitsuki, took off his coat and sat it on the back of the chair. "So what's up?" Reid question as he took a sip of the hot fresh coffee.

Mitsuki put his hand in his pocket and pulled out an envelope and handed over to Reid. Reid pulled out the contents and his eyes widened, it was a photo of him, asleep, in bed, in his room. Reid looked shocked, he looked up at MItsuki who just starred at him. "What is this?"  
"It was let tapped to my front door this morning...and really that should be my question" Mitsuki voice turned harsh, not in a nasty way more 'I'm worried about you' kinda of way.

"Any idea on who left it?"

"Spence, I didn't see anyone, I already asked at the desk and they hadn't seen anyone that morning" Spencer looked down at the image again, checking every inch, trying to find a little clue within it, but nothing. "Spence what's all this about?"

"How am I suppose to know?" Reid voice was firm and blunt, taken back, Mitsuki just sighed, he cared for Spencer and didn't want anything bad happening to him, but he didn't really even know who Spencer actually was. "Look I'm sorry, just this person was in the my room whilst I slept. Bit scary to be honest".

"Spencer, I can help you down at the station if you need it? I work there remember, I can keep you safe" Reid looked up hastily, he couldn't , if Mitsuki were to find out who he really was, then everything could go wrong and the unsub could find out. "Oh turn it over" Reid did just that, on the back of the photo was the word "Preccator".

"What does it mean Spence?"

"Sinner, it means sinner" Spencer looked down at the photo again, he didn't know what to think, he knew exactly why he was being called a sinner, but why is he being targeted?

"Is this the same guy who killing all those gay people? Is that what it means?" Reid didn't know how to answer, again he had to be very careful.

"Maybe, let's hope not"

"I'm calling the station, we can help you out" Mitsuki pulled out his phone and Reid darted across the table. "NO DONT!" He pulled the phone away from Mitsuki's ear, he was taken back. "Sorry...I didn't mean to do that. It's just, we don't know if it is for definite yet, and I rather not waste the police time in a false lead"

"Yeah maybe you're right, but the moment things begin to get weird, I'm calling the cops" Reid nodded in agreement, Mitsuki lent forward and softly put his hand on top of Reid. Reid went to pull back but realised, no one knew him here and he didn't know them. He smiled and looked up at Mitsuki. "Instead of going to the club tonight, can I take you out for dinner?" Mitsuki smiled and tightened his grasp on Reid's hand. "When and where?" He smiled.

"Rokurinsha Restaurant, 7:30pm"

"That's one of my favourite restaurants" They both stood up, putting on there coats and grabbing their coffee. "So you picking me up then?" Reid gave a cute little giggle, smiled and nodded. Mitsuki gave Reid a hug and kiss on the cheek and watched as Reid walked off. He couldn't help but smile. "Who are you Spencer Reid?


	7. Dr Spencer Reid

Reid headed back to the apartments, he needed to tell the team of what he discovered. He knows that they'll ask questions about how he obtained the information but he already had the figured out. He like's Mitsuki, and he's pretending to be a gay man, why not use that to his advantage, pretend to start dating Mitsuki to hide that fact he really is dating him. Reid went over and over in his head what he was going to say to Hotch and Morgan when his phone went off. "Reid" Why they use their last names to answer the phone always puzzled Reid.

"Come to the station" It was Hotch, he sounded desperate in a Hotch kind of way.

"What? Why?"

"Just do it Reid" Hotch hung up the phone and left a very confused Reid on the other side.

Mitsuki dumped his bag on the floor near the door, he had a small apartment, and boxes were still freshly packed. He knew he told Spencer that he live elsewhere but he didn't really know the guy. He felt bad about lying to him but it's not like it's fully a lie. He is moving to Virginia, but not till next week. Mitsuki rummaged through the packed boxes looking for one in particular. "Found you!" One of the boxes right on the top held all his technology, right on top was his laptop. He barely used it and when he did it was last resort.

Mitsuki put the laptop town on the table, and sat in front of it. He grabbed the packet of smokes that were in his pocket and his lighter, pulled on out placing it in his mouth as he opened up the laptop. Taking a draw on his cigarette and breathing out the dirty grey cloud of smoke. Mitsuki opened his laptop and went to google, and put in one thing, one name. "Spencer Reid". Mitsuki scrolled down till he found an article that was written by a 'Dr Spencer Reid', he clicked on the link, and there he was, his Spencer, the guy he met in the bar. A photo was at the top of the article, a photo of him giving a lecture and a police seminar, with a title reading 'Profiling 101'.

Mitsuki read the article, read about who Reid was. He starred at the screen as he rubbed his face, he took another draw of his cigarette and went back to google search and this time he typed in 'Dr Spencer Reid', and the moment it opened, it was filled with hundreds of articles and papers written by Dr Spencer Reid, photos of him and then there was one link that caught his eye. 'FBI Agent Dr Spencer Reid...' He opened it up and there he was again, this time he was younger, he knew it was him the moment he set eyes on the picture but Reid was younger, skinner, his hair was shorter. But it was him. "The BAU team welcome new member to their team, young Dr Spencer Reid, only 22 years old becoming the youngest FBI agent the bureau has ever had" Mitsuki closed his laptop, and sat back in his chair.

Mitsuki didn't know how to feel, he was angry, confused, upset, hurt and so many more feelings poured through his body, through his veins. He didn't know what to do, he picked up his phone and scrolled down to Reid's name, Mitsuki just starred at the phone before turning it off.

"What's wrong? Why we at the Station?" The team were all waiting for Reid to turn up, they had to tell him that someone was in the apartment was night. It was kind of good that the Unsub left a photo behind, and they don't have to explain the 5 camera's located around his apartment. Reid walked through the door and put his messenger bag down on the chair. He didn't even need to hear the response, on the board was the photo that Mitsuki had shown him, fear began to rise up in his body. "Did Mitsuki give you that?" he pointed to the photograph.

"Mitsuki?" Morgan asked.

"The guy from the bar..."

"Oh right, the one you kissed?" Morgan smiled but Reid just gave him daggers.

"Why would Mitsuki give us this image?" Hotch asked. Reid walked over and took the photo off the bored, he looked on the back but this didn't have the same phrase written on the back, this just had 'Preccator'. "Reid"

"Mitsuki received the same image of me this morning, I had just left after meeting him when you called Hotch" Morgan gave a kinky wink, Morgan hadn't learnt he always had to find a way of winding the young agent up. "Enough Morgan. Did he say anything else?"

"No only that he found it taped to the door" Reid was trying to avoid the back of the image, the team obviously knows about him and Mitsuki, but he's worried that they will find out what they believe to be fake and part of the job was al true. "Why did you look at the back of the image Reid" Hotch looked at him, _'Shit!'_ Reid thought. "No reason"

"Reid..." Hotch looked at him, well it was more of a glare, Hotch's eyes were always harsh, but they had this slight shine to them, this normally showed when he was with Jack or when one of the team where in trouble, or having a hard time. "Honestly it's nothing" Reid gave a false smile before putting the photo back on the board.

"We've found another one" One of the police officers burst through the door, the team didn't even hesitate before they were on the move. Reid was about to leave to follow after them but his phone went off. "Be there in a minute" The others had already left the room, Reid looked at his phone 'Mitsuki'. "Hello"

"Hi" Mitsuki's voice was different, it was harsh but still soft.

"I can't talk right now, I've got to go..."

"I know who you are..." Reid stopped in his tracks, his bag was in his hand, stopped in the frame of the door. "What are you on about Mitsuki?" Reid was confused, what was Mitsuki on about. Reid was about to say goodbye but before he had the chance. "Dr Spencer Reid".

This is just a mini chaper - I wanted to carry on this chapter but preffered how i ended it, and i hope you do too. Think of it as part 1 of a 2 part chapter.  
Currently writing part 2 of said chapter, and I'll be less busy this weekend so hopefully more can go up. Thank you for all the reads, kudos and comments it all means so much to me.  
QUESTION - Does anyone want more explict scenes/content within this story? Or should I do a side story, like this but a lot smaller and more explict? I Really want to add a smut scene in but I don't know the ages of my readers and rather keep the readers happy...please let me know in the comments below!  
Hope you enjoy this new mini chapter


	8. Trust us

Cancel

Trust Me

"Dr Spencer Reid, special agent to the FBI's Behavioural Analyse Unit" Mitsuki was angry, Spencer had lied to him, all his life Mitsuki has been lied too, let down, but he felt Reid was different. But he was no better than anyone else. "Mitsuki, let me explain please" But Reid never got the chance too, the line was dead. "Mitsuki? Mitsuki!" Reid slammed his phone down on the table right at the moment JJ walks in.

"Hey what's up?" JJ looked at him with concerning eyes.

"It's nothing" Reid knew that JJ didn't believe him but what else can he say? That the one guy he's truly felt something for has left because of him, because of this job. Reid love's his job but not just once has the thought of leaving sounded like music in his ears. "Talk to me Spence" JJ reached out a hand.

"I said it's nothing Jennifer" JJ withdrew, she knew something was definitely wrong as Reid only called her Jennifer when he was seriously pissed or something was wrong. She followed him with her eyes as he walked out of the room, more of a storm then a walk she thought.

Crowds of people huddled around the fresh body that laid limp on the busy sidewalk. Reporters hauled around massive cameras and journalists with the big noses and microphones. The team ducked under the crime scene tape whilst putting on the blue plastic gloves. "What have we got?" Asked Hotch.

"Male, mid to late 20's found approximately 7:32am by a jogger" Reid knelt down to the body, getting a closer look at the victim. As Reid knelt down everything went a little blurry, his head hurt all of a sudden. He felt a hand on his shoulder trying to support him, there was a voice to but for a second he couldn't hear anything, it was very much like he was stood in the middle of busy traffic. "Reid!" Morgan said. "Reid!" Reid came around and was looking Morgan in the eyes. "You okay man?"

"What? Yeah, Yeah I'm fine just felt a little dizzy" Morgan helped him up onto his feet, making sure he was steady. "Are you sure you're okay?" Reid nodded.

"Yeah I'm fine just haven't slept much and haven't had time for breakfast or my coffee" Giving a false laugh. Reid had never been effected over seeing a dead body before, and he had worked on homophobic cases before, but something was different about this, it felt personal. Reid stepped away from the body, when he looked up at the crowd he saw a familiar face. Mitsuki.

Mitsuki and Reid made eye contact, Mitsuki didn't say anything he just backed away from the crowd and headed down an alleyway only a few feet away from the crime scene. Reid kind of got the hint and followed after him, he checked to make sure no one was looking, but everyone seemed to be busy either talking to the media or checking over the scene.

The alley was small and dirty, like all alleyway's are, but this had a peculiar smell about it. Like someone was cooking raw flesh, that obviously could be from where the wind was blowing, could be carrying the smell of the dead body over in this direction. "Mitsuki what are you doing here?" Reid was not impressed, If anyone saw them talking, all hell could break loose.

"I needed to see you" Mitsuki looked young and innocent, there was something in the way he say those 5 words that made Reid's hairs stand up on his arms and the back of his neck. "I heard someone else had been murdered so I knew you would be here. I don't want to be one of 'those' guys but after the way I handled things earlier, I didn't want to end it like that" Reid looked at him, Reid never realised just how much alike they truly were. Same height, same build, same eyes, and even though Reid was slightly pissed at him, with those eyes, he couldn't stay mad at him for long. "You still shouldn't have come here...It's an active crime scene and I don't want.." Reid stopped in his tracks he didn't want to creep Mitsuki out, they weren't even dating.

"You don't want me what?" Mitsuki moved closer to Reid.

"No it's nothing"

"No come on...you don't want me what?" At this point Reid was almost backed up against the wall, Mitsuki body close to his, his lips looked soft and sweet, his cheeks rosy and eyes shinning in the morning sun. He looked so innocent, and perfect. "I don't want you getting hurt" Mitsuki raised one corner of his lip into a half smile, it was cute Reid thought. "Why didn't you tell me who you really were?"

"It's not that I didn't want too, it's that...It's that I couldn't"

"Why not?"

"I cant tell you..." Mitsuki was getting closer and closer to Reid, Mitsuki's body was practically touching Reid's, and Reid's back knocked against the cold hard brick wall. "Why not?"

"I will tell you when I can, I promise"

"But when will that be? I want to know who you are Dr Spencer Reid...I want to know the man behind the mask, I want to know who the guy I like truly is" Reid was taken back, did Mitsuki really just tell him he liked him? Reid didn't know what to think, he could only ask. "What did you just say?"

"You heard be..." Mitsuki didn't repeat himself, instead he placed his hand on the back of Reid's head and pulled him in for a kiss. Mitsuki's lips were soft and wet, they were small but plumped. Reid was still in shock and didn't know whether to respond or not. His team were literally just round the corner, if anyone were to see them then game up. Mitsuki licked Reid's lower lip causing a small moan to slip from Reid's throat, he could feel Mitsuki smile. A moment later, a wave of warmth run over Reid like a strong gust of wind, again, feeling light headed. He forgot for a moment where he was, he was over taken by the taste and sensation of Mitsuki. He could feel another hand reach around his waist, the other on his cheek. Mitsuki bit his bottom lip again causing another moan to escape, and this time Mitsuki took the opportunity to slid in his tongue. Reid's eye closed and he was completely absorbed into him, kissing him in perfect rhythm, bodies moving with one another as they slowly rock there hips together. Hands slowly exploring one another, not to much that they looked as if they were having sex with there clothes on, just a tasteful amount.

Rossi saw Mitsuki standing amongst the crowd, and knew exactly who he was looking for. He watched as Reid too noticed him. Rossi knew something was going on with the kid, but didn't want to say anything, if the kid wanted to talk he would have by now. Rossi carried on watching discreetly, Reid followed Mitsuki down an alleyway, and disappeared. Rossi waited a moment before following him, making sure he also wasn't being watched. About the walk around the alley way and he noticed the two men standing halfway down the alley, talking. He made sure to keep out of sight. The pair talked for what only seemed like a few moments, before Rossi was shocked to what he was witnessing. Mitsuki pushed Reid against the brick wall and kissed him passionately. Rossi wasn't surprised as he thought he would be, one of his team member and who he considers close friends, was making out with some guy down and alley. Rossi didn't know what part was the bad, the fact that Reid stooped this low and was making out with the guy down the alley or that fact he is on a job.

Rossi felt kind of creepy watching the two boys but he felt stuck in place, like he was trapped in cement and his shoes had turned to lead. But Rossi couldn't hide anymore, the kid was on a job and he needed to tell him as much as Reid will try and deny anything of such, Rossi had to intervene. He began to walk down the alleyway, he got closer to the guys before coughing, the kind of cough when clearing you're throat or trying to get someone's attention. Reid pushes Mitsuki away and stares at Rossi wide eyed.

Reid felt as if the whole world was seeping into a black hole, his body felt lightweight and free, almost dizzy liked, he forgot everything that was going on, he just wanted to stay in this moment, forever. But that was soon broken, he thought he could hear someone walking towards them but felt it only to him imagination, it was until the person drew near and made himself known that Reid pushed Mitsuki away from him, panicking. A fairly tanned man stood in front of them, hands in pockets. Rossi. Reid, panicking pushed Mitsuki further way from him and before he got a chance to speak, Rossi got there first. "You do know were on a job right?" Rossi said with a smile, so Reid would hopefully understand that he wasn't mad but only messing with him. "Rossi it's not what it.."

"Well talk about this later, for now it stay's between the 3 of us?" Reid mouthed the words 'Thank you' and Rossi nodded. Reid gave a little smile to Mitsuki as he passed him, but Mitsuki grabbed held of his head startling Reid. "Stop hiding who you are, does it look as if they have a problem?" Mitsuki gestured his head towards Rossi who was waiting for Reid.

"I can't"

"There's nothing wrong with being who you are, and he seems like a nice man"

"What Rossi? He is, he's like family"

"Then if there like family, then they'll understand. You're gay for god sake, it's not like you've killed anyone" Mitsuki laughed but Reid didn't. "You haven't killed anyone have you?"

"I haven't murdered anyone if that's what you mean" Mitsuki was a bit creeped out by Reid's answer and obviously being a police officer in training he too needed to expect that at some point he will be aiming a gun at someone, and at some point someone will be lying on the floor motionless in front of him, from a weapon that he pulled. Spencer pulled his hand away from Mitsuki's "Come to my place later okay, I'll explain everything I can. I'll text you when I've finished. okay?" Mitsuki nodded in agreement before walking away down the other end off the alley.

Reid walked towards Rossi but didn't say anything just looked down. He tried to walk passed him before Rossi grabbed hold of his arm. "Look kid" Reid looked up at Rossi, he tried to avoid eye contact but it seem kind of hard. "This will stay between you and me, but you have to tell them at some point"

"It's not what you think, its all.."

"It's all part of the case? Don't give me that crap Reid, I know you. And you don't need to lie to us. Family trust each other"

"It's not that I don't trust you it's just"

"It's just what Reid because to me it feels as if you don't trust us enough to tell us that you like this guy, like you don't trust us enough to tell us that these cases are getting to you"

"There not-t..." Reid stuttered.

"Stop lying Spencer, I saw you by the body earlier on, I know that some cases get to people, god I've had my fair share over the years. Reid you're gay. So what? Big whoop" Reid was taken back slightly by Rossi, he thought he would be the last person to be okay with him being gay, Rossi can be a tad old fashioned sometimes. "Look you don't have to tell them just yet, just tell them before someone else does or they find out like I did, they deserve the truth" Reid bowed his head, his soft brown locks falling in front of his face, Rossi placed a hand on his shoulder, and Reid raised his head. "Look kid at the end of the day you're family, I love you, they love you so don't ever questioned that" Reid smiled. "Now we have got an active crime scene about 10ft front of us...shell we get back to work?" Spencer nodded and the pair headed out of the alleyway. For some reason Reid felt as if a small amount of weight had been lifted off his shoulders. Maybe this wouldn't be as bad as he thought.


	9. An end to a secret

The team had been sat in the same room since 9:30 this morning, if they stay in there any longer, they are sure to go mad. They were all sat around the table, Morgan looking through the case photos, Hotch and Rossi discussing in the corner, Reid and Emily were working on the geographical profiling of victimology and JJ was on the phone to the media, trying to stop them from giving this guy a name. So far, there trying to call him 'The Brookyln Ripper'. Nothing new or original but giving these guys a name no matter what, struck fear into the publics hearts.

"Have we got enough for a profile?" Emily asked. This case just seemed to be getting harder and harder, the unsub was good, he left not trace of himself behind, the footage of him in Spencer's apartment brough up nothing, they were stuck with no leads and no hopes of going forward. "Nothing! We need him to make a mistake, and a big one at that" Rossi replied.

"JJ did you release the information to the media?" Asked Hotch.

"I did it yesterday sir, hopefully he will phone"

"Good! Garcia, make sure to be ready to track the call and look over any cctv footage in and around the area of the last crim scene". Hotch never looked panicked, he always looked calm and ready for anything, everyone always wondered how he can be so calm in situations likes this, but over the years they've come to realise that most of the time he is more worried then they are, he just knows how to put on a face.

"Sir, we have a bit of a situation out here…" The Captain said as he opened the door. It was nearly midnight so practically all officers had either gone home or were out on night duty. The team all hurried into the main part of the precinct, where there they were met with a surprise. A tall man was shaking and covered in blood, his blood. His face was battered and brusied, you can see he'd been crying as tears marks cut through the blood stains. The officers on duty were trying to help him as the team came out, he just stood there not knowing what to do. "Mitsuki!" Reid rushed over, he recognised him almost instantly. The guy's all looked at Reid as he darted towards the beaten man, looking at one another. "Agent, you know this man?" asked the captain.

"Yeah, he's um…" He looked at his team mates. "He's a friend of mine" Rossi was hoping for another answer to leaves Reid's mouth, but hemust admit this really isn't the time to be outing himself. "What on earth happened to you?" Mitsuki to darted towards Reid and embraced him. He wrapped his arms around Reid's waist, and hid his head in his neck as he burst into tears. The team all watched, they knew who Mitsuki was, it wasn't as if it was hard to remember seeing you're 'Straight' team mate make out with another guy in the middle of a club, all for a case.

"Hey, hey! What happened?" Reid lifted Mitsuki's head, placing both hands on the lower part of his face and raising it to meet hiis. "Tell me please" Mitsuki sniffled as he tried to hold back the tears, Reid guided Mitsuki to a chair and knelt down in front of him. "H-hee just came out" Mitsuki took in a breath."Of nowhere, he hi-tt me over the head. I was walking back from the club, I was waiting for you're text but it never came so I just went home"

"Shit!" Reid looked down and shook his head, he had completely forgot he was meant to have texted his address to Mitsuki, Reid feels heis partly to blame in this. "I'm so sorry! We've been so busy here I just forgot"

"It's not you're fault" Mitsuki grabbed Spencer's hand and held it in his, Rossi hid the smile the rose on his face, the others just looked, they knew Reid was 'Pretending' to be gay to the case, so they went along with this. The captain lent over to Hotch "I thought they were just friends?" The captain looked at the pair, confused.

"It's a long story, it's not how it looks" Hotch explained the situation whilst Reid continuted to help Mitsuki.

"Did you see what he looked like?" Mitsuki nodded.

"Can we get a sketch artist here as soon as possible" Reid said turning to the closest officer.

"Yes Agent!"

"Right in your own time tell me what happened" Mitsuki took in a deep breath, crying so much as made it hard for him to breath, his lungs felt as if they were going to collapse, his chest flet tight and his face was sticky from the fallen tears. "I walked out the bar about 11ish, I had a few so I couldn't drive and you know I don't live far from the bar" Reid nodded. "I could here someone come up behind me, but I didn't think anything of it. It wasn't till I got down the alley that I felt his hand around my mouth" Tears fell freely once more as Mitsuki tried to breath, talk and cry all at once. "He grabbed me and pushed me into the wall, punching me in the face repeatedly. I didn't know what to do, I wanted to scream but nothing came out. Next thing I knew I was on the floor, onw hand around my throat the other…" Mitsuki just stopped, he couldn't talk, he just starred blanley at Reid, mouth open as if it wants to say something but just followed my emptiness.

"Come on, it's okay, you're safe. I'm here" Reid placed his hand on the side of his face, Mitsuki whinced slightly, the pain got to the point where it was just numb. "His other hand was trying to under putton my trousers" Reid's blood was boiling, he could feel his face get red with anger, he wanted to kill him, he wanted to kill this man with his bare hands. "He said my name, he knew who I was…I tried to fight back, I found an old rusted pipe of the floor and smaked him over the head with it, I ran, I ran as fast as I could, I didn't know where but somehow I ended up here…I tried to call for you I did, I really did" Mitsuki just broke, he didn't even keep the tears quite this time. He cried out and he hugged into Reid, Reid wrapping his arms around him to comfort him. The pair stayed like this for a moment longer before Rossi intervened. "Come on kid, lets get you cleaned up" Rossi helped him up, taking him into one of the many empty rooms. "I'll be right back with a first aid kit" Rossi smiled and left the pair alone.

They all watched through the window, Reid taking care of Mitsuki, cleaning him up, talking to him, trying to make him laugh and forget the ordel he just experienced. At this point, every knew that this was just for the case, but really genually cared for the guy. "Is he okay?" JJ asked as Rossi approched them

"I think he's going to be okay…in time" Rossi made the face, the one he gives when he's cares about something, that face he pulls when a member of his family needed him, the face he pulled when he was hurting. "You know something don't you?" Asked Hotch.

"Know about what?" Rossi pretending to act as if he didn't have a clue, knowing fall well that there all profilers, it's hard to lie around them, sometimes it was pretty annoying. "You know what Dave. Those two, you know what's really going on?"

"That is something you need to talk to the kid about, not me" Rossi panted Hotch on the shoulder as he headed towards the exist. The team's head's all turn back from Rossi to the Reid.

Spencer was sat on the chair oppisit, carefully cleaning the blood of Mitsuki's face, being so gentle Mitsuki felt like he was being cleaned with a feather. "Thank you" Mitsuki gave a painful smile.

"What for?"

"Caring" The pair looked at one another, smiling. Reid wanted to kiss him, he wanted to take away his pain, he wanted to do it so badly, that he didn't even if this is how the team find out. "I will always care" Reid smiled at him. "Stay with me tonight, I don't want you going home. If this is the guy were after then he will know where you live" Reid felt bad, he could see Mitsuki expression changed from scared to fucking terrified. "Are you sure" Reid nodded.

"How else am I going to care for you?"

"Will you be okay…with them knowing" Mitsuki said as he gestured his head in the direction of the other agents.

"Right now, all I care about is you and making sure you're okay and safe" Reid placed all the dirty tissues and tossed them into the bin. He held out his hand, Mitsuki smiled and placed his hand in Reid's. It was warm, soft but not too soft, you could feel he works hard. The pair walk out, no longer hand in hand, walking towards the team. "I feel in best interest for Mitsuki, I think he should stay with you tonight Reid" Reid was shocked, why was Hotch suggesting this? "The unsub has targeted him, why we don't know yet. Which means his apartment isn't safe, and he only really knows you" Hotch just starred at Reid, it was hard for him to read what Hotch was thinking.

"Yes sir!"

"Thank you, all of you" Mitsuki looked at them all one by one and smiled, showing his gratitude. "I really appreciate all this"

"It's out pleasure" JJ said from the back. The pair were the first to leave, it was way past 2am and both were extreamly tiered all they could think abou was bed, and sleep.

"Why did you tell Reid to take him home?" Morgan asked.

"Testing a theory" That was all Hotch said before he picked up his coat and let the precinct. Morgan followed soon after, forgetting Hotch is his ride home. The others all left together as they were staying in the other hotel.

Reid's apartment was gently lit, a small light dotted in the corner of the room made the place feel warm and inviting. Books spread across the floor new the sofa, paper sprawled across the table and a mount of coffee mugs sat unwashed by the sink. "Come on in, sorry it's nothing special. Just somewhere I'm staying during the case"

"So you don't really live here then?" Reid shook his head. "Then where?"

"Same place as you, Virginia" Mitsuki was glad but he couldn't show it. Reid had still lied to him, he understood why, well sort off but as much as it hurts he knew Reid was probably just protecting himself. "Why are you here then? Why me?"

"What do you mean?"

"You're tracking down a serial killer killing gay people and just so happens that you bump into me…"

"It's not like that. Look take a seat, I'll grab us a drink…coffee or beer?"

"Beer please, need it after today" Reid grabbed two beers from the fridge and walked over to the couch, sitting next to Mitsuki. "here" handing him the drink.

"Thanks" Mitsuki open the can and took a big gulp before setting it down and taking a breath.

"We were called in on a job, a man was killing members of the LGBT community and the police force were stuck, we had no leads, no evidence, we were stuck. I was told to go undercover as a gay man, try and pull him out of the darkness"

"You made yourself a target?" Reid nodded. "Even though it's dangerous?"  
"Well I didn't really have a say in the matter, I was told to by my boss"

"But you could get hurt, he's targeting gay's…you're you are gay right" Reid nodded.

"Yeah. Just, know one knows, besides Rossi of course"

"Rossi?"

"oh the man from earlier on, tall, lightly tanned…Italian"

"oh him, I like him" They laugh a little.

"Look I went on this case not knowing what would happen, but I met you and it all change. I don't just worry about myself anymore but I worry about you, I've never felt like this before. I'm not going to lie I don't really understand it, but all I know is that I like you and I want to keep you safe" Mitsuki looked at Reid, they looked each other for a moment. Without hesitation, Reid crashed his lips against Mitsuki's, they were hot. His hands placed on his cheeks as he deepens the kiss, pulling Mitsuki in closer. There lips moved in perfect harmony of one another, the pace quicken and became more and more heated. Mitsuki moved his lips to Reid necks, make Spencer lay his head back and moan softly. The sound sent chills down Mitsuki's back and down his pants, which were getting tighter and tighter.

Reid dragged Mitsuki's face back to his kissing him more before pushing him back onto the sofa, lying on top of him. Reid began grinding his harden bulge against Mitsuki, casuing him to moan. There bodies moved as one as they carried on grinding there hips together, kissing, touching. Hands roaming freely across one anothers body, Mitsuki fingers ended up and the top button of Reid's shirt. Spencer smiled and began taking off Mitsuki's too. The skin on skin contact caused the pair to moan simultaneously. Mitsuki traced Spencer's body with his fingers, feeling every inch of him, his neck, torso and then stopped when he got to the top of Reid's arm. "What are these?" Reid moved his hand away.

"Nothing" Mitsuki just starred at him, he could tell they were old markings but clearly they still cut deep for Reid. The lips become one once more, this time more passionitly. The pace became quicker, the room become hotter and there bodies become sweaty. Reid lent into Mistuki ear and whisptered. "Bedroom?" Mitsuki giggled and allowed Reid to pull him up, making sure to not break the kiss.

The pair tripped over everything that stood in there way to the bedroom. Reid began underbuttoning his trouser, which was soon taken over by Mitsuki, so Reid started on his instead. They realised how hard it was it walk, undress someone else, kiss and try and get to the bedroom whilst things were in the way was. But the made it successfully. They crashed onto the bed and Reid moaned loudly, he could feel he length harden more and more, he wanted nothing but realise, nothing but to feel himself inside Mitsuki. He has been waiting for this moment for a long time. They get under the covers, hearing the moans, the odd giggles now and then. For the first time, reid felt happy within himself.

Morgan and Hotch got back to the apartment not long after Reid. They couldn't hear anything coming from the room so just presumed the pair were asleep. They unlocked the door, and a cold gust of wind caught them by surprise. "God dammit Morgan, did you forget to close the window"

"Sorry Hotch" Morgan said as he turned on the computer monitors, and sitting down in fron of them"

"Anything?"

"Not realy there just on the…" Morgan's eye's went wide, unable to finsih his sentanced as he gauped at the screen.

"What's wrong?" Morgan said nothing but carry on looking at the computor screen. Hotch walked towards him and saw what he could see. Reid and Mitsuki were making on his Reid sofa. This wasn't an act, this wasn't anything to make the unsub believe Reid was gay. Reid WAS Gay. Morgan and Hotch watch as it all unfolds quickly. Watched as the pair dry humped eachother, watched as they took off each others clothes, watched as they both struggle to walk to the bedroom. It's not an act anymore, Reid didn't know the cameras were there, he isnt putting a front up about this, he's doing this because he wants too. Morgan switched to Bedroom cam, it was dark but from the vaigly lit room, who can see something going on in the bed. Morgan just made a weird sound before abruptly turning off the monitors.

"You do know, were are going to have to watch this tomorrow right?" said Hotch.


	10. Spying

The sun creeped through the crack in the curtains, sending a little ray of sunlight right into Reid's eye's causing him to stir. Reid rolled over, wrapping his arm around Mitsuki. Mitsuki groaned in his sleep but Reid pulled himself in closer, lying in head snug into Mitsuki's neck.

The pair stayed like this for a while longer, until Reid's alarm went off waking them both. "Morning beautiful!" Mitsuki's voice was deep and husky when he wakes, his hair laid a mess and eyes tried to adjust to the morning light. Reid looked across to him, smiling. 'Fuck me he's gorgeous' Reid thought. Leaning over and placing a kiss on Mitsuki's soft, pink lips. Mitsuki smirked as he pulled himself up on top of Reid. "Ouch!" Mitsuki gasped as he looked down to see what stabbed him in the leg. "Your friends awake too I see" Mitsuki smirked again as he placed himself comfortably on Reid before leaning down and kissing him.

Things get heated within seconds. The kisses turn wet and sloppy, hands roaming one another's bodies, hips grinding against each other. Small moans slipped from their lips now and then. Mitsuki moved his kisses to Reid's chest, slowly moving them down, closer and closer to his length. Reid gasped, he put his hand on Mitsuki's head lightly, slowly guiding it to his member. A loud moan escaped Spencer's lips as he felt Mitsuki's mouth around the end, his tongue dancing across the tip, teasing Spencer. Mitsuki took in Reid's length, every inch. Reid watched as his head bobbed up and down under the covers, moaning. He sucked in breath through

his teeth, knotting his fingers amongst Mitsuki's hair as Reid moved his hips, practically fucking his mouth.

"Ahh shit!" Moaned Reid. "That feels good".

After a few more moments, Reid released his lowed in Mitsuki's mouth, moaning his name. Having to bite his lip to stop him from being too loud. Mitsuki snaked his way up out of the sheets, still lying on Reid's chest. "Why didn't you do that last night?" Reid giggled.

"You didn't exactly give me enough time" The pair laughed as they stayed cuddled up for at least another half an hour. "Coffee?" Asked Mitsuki.

"Please"

"Go on then" Mitsuki laughed, Reid looked at him shocked, in a jokingly way. Reid just huffed and hauled himself out of the covers, he couldn't bring himself to argue with him, not with him looking so cute. He put on his lounge pants and headed into the kitchen, Mitsuki following Reid's butt with his eyes.

Morgan and Hotch were already sat at the monitors, coffee's in hand and faces of grimace. On the monitors was Reid and Mitsuki, engaging in sexual activities, again. "I can't Hotch, I'm turning it off!" Morgan didn't care about his best mate being gay, but he did care about sitting there at 8am watching him getting a blowjob, made his stomach turned. "Why did you have to install audio too, it's worse when you can hear it" Morgan turned off the monitors as Hotch moved away to the table where all the case files sat sprawled out everywhere. "I didn't" Hotch giggled to himself as Morgan Realised that the sound wasn't coming through the monitors but through the walls.

"Oh God!" Morgan looked disgusted as he moved away. "I'm going to get proper coffee, you coming?" Hotch turned his head gusting his ear, trying to listen out. "Ahh shit!"

"Yep!" Hotch grabbed his coat and the pair left, quickly.

"How do you like it?" Reid shouted from one room to another.

"Hard and fast" Mitsuki sounded back.

"You're coffee..." Reid raised an eyebrow and shock his head, a little smirk on his face.

"Oh, black and 3 sugars please" Reid carried on making the coffee, when he suddenly felt arms wrap around his waist. "Hello" Mitsuki rested his head on Reid's shoulders.

"Hello" Reid replied, as he unwrapped himself from Mitsuki's grasp, handing him a hot cup of coffee. "I've got to go to work soon, you can either come with me or stay here it?"

"I'll stay"

"You sure?"

"Spence, I'll be fine okay, if I need you I'll ring you" Reid kissed him lightly. "Smoke?" Reid nodded. As Reid picked up his cigarettes his phone goes off.

HOTCH

Come to the precinct at 12 instead of 10.

"Looks like you have been for a few more hours yet" Reid said as this time he comes up behind Mitsuki and wrapping his arms around his waist, kissing him on the neck. Mitsuki handed him a cigarette. "Thanks" Reid placed it between his lips and lit. Reid and Mitsuki were both regretting coming out with no tops on, they shivered as they smoked. "So. What do you want to do with the spare 2 and a half hours with me?" Reid asked.

"Wanna grab some breakfast?"

"Depends what?" Asked Reid.

"Ummm...pancakes?" Reid took a drag of his cigarette, exhaling a lung full of what looks like a dirty grey cloud.

"Sounds good to me" Reid smiled as face the open air, watching the people walk past. He always looked at people and try and guess what there about to do, think, say, he was fascinated by humans.

Morgan and Hotch sat across from one another at the table, the place they had been staying in opts as hotel so there is a small little café in the lobby. "Hello my darlings...oh" Garcia's eyes widen. "My morning just got better" She said as she winks at Morgan, who obviously winks.

"Hello Mama" Morgan kissing her on the cheek. She was followed by Emily, JJ and Rossi. "Hello everyone else"

"No Reid?" Asked Emily. They all grabbed chairs, sitting with the two men.

"Reid's umm" Morgan coughs. "Kind of occupied". Morgan still looked scared, he has seen so many horrible things in the world, but he just couldn't shake the image of those to, doing 'those' things to each other. "What do you mean sugar plum?" It was Penelope to ask this time.

"Morgan don't!" Hotch's voice rose from nowhere.

"Hotch they see it later anyway" Morgan looked at the man sat at the other end of the table, head in the

casefile.

"See what?" Garcia bounded up and down in her seat like a little school girl. All four of them were looking at Morgan, all curious on what it is. Rossi was just starring at him as he could guess what Morgan was about to say. He wanted the kid to be able to tell everyone in his own time, but looks like that's too late. He didn't agree with the cameras being in the room, as things like this happen, but there wasn't much he could do. If he told Morgan not too everyone will still find out eventually when they watch the footage back. So instead, Rossi just sat back and listened to what the kids been up to this time.

"So, um, well"

"Oh spit it out Morgan" JJ barked.

"Reid's kind of preoccupied with Mitsuki"

"What do you mean?" Asked Emily.

"Ooh hoo hoo ho no way!" Garcia's face lit up as she looked at Morgan, but everyone else just looked at her, eyebrows raised. "Seriously?" Morgan nodded. "Boy genius and his beautiful Asian friend?" Morgan nodded again.

"Wait! What?" Emily's voice got louder.

"Me and Hotch got back last night and checked up on Reid and Mitsogi"

"Mitsuki" Rossi corrected.

"Sorry, Mitsuki. They, well they ohh you'll just have to come see it for yourselves, I'm not repeating it" They all picked up their bags and coats and followed Morgan to his room. As they reached the room, Reid and Mitsuki came out of theirs.

They walked passed Reid's apartment, Morgan couldn't hear anything, but he knew when he say him he wouldn't be able to look at Reid in the same way, every time he does he just see him, naked with that guy, or hear him moaning. He hated it. "Come on then, I'm curious" Said Emily as she gestured Morgan to move.

They all sat down in front of the monitors, Morgan skipping to last night and then sitting back, letting them watch. "We were called in on a job, a man was killing members of the LGBT community and the police force were stuck, we had no leads, no evidence, we were stuck. I was told to go undercover as a gay man, try and pull him out of the darkness"

"What is he doing?" Emily said. "He's blowing cover".

"You made yourself a target?" Reid nodded. "Even though it's dangerous?"

"Well I didn't really have a say in the matter, I was told to by my boss"

"But you could get hurt, he's targeting gay's...you're gay. Wait you are gay right" Reid nodded.

"Yeah. Just, no one knows, besides Rossi of course"

Everyone was shocked, Reid had just admitted he was gay, everyone had already guessed what could be going on, but finally hearing him admit it, felt weird. "That's not all" Said Morgan as he skips on a little. They watched as Reid kisses Mitsuki, watches him as he pushes him back onto the sofa, watches as they take of each other clothes and grind against one another, they watched as Reid stumble to the bedroom. No one knew what to say besides just gorping at the screen. Not only have they discovered they best mate was gay, but that he's rather kinky. "Could be worse least you weren't poor Morgan here" Every turned to Hotch, they had all forgotten he was even there.

"What do you mean?" Rossi asked.

"Reid was moaning so loud this morning that Morgan here though we had installed audio in Reid's apartment too" He chuckled. It was a rare sight to see Hotch laugh, it must have been a sight.

"What was he doing this morning?" Emily shouldn't have asked. They all turn back to the monitors, Garcia had the smile of a Chester cat, she had read so many fanfictions with gay characters, but not she gets to witness it first-hand. Morgan skipped through till this morning, again they witness rather lewd activity. Morgan turn the monitors back to the present, everyone speechless, they could see the boys sat in the bedroom, sitting on the bed, they didn't know what to think, they knew they couldn't look at Reid in the same light, like Morgan.

"Spence, when you go back to Virginia, can we meet?" Reid looked at him puzzled.

"Why wouldn't we?"

"Oh, I don't know I just worry this is a onetime thing and it will all change when you leave" Mitsuki bowed his head, Reid sat next to him, arm around him and laid his head on his shoulder and continued to brush his hair with his fingers. "Mitsuki, it's not like you're not going there either. The moment we land I'm taking you out on a real date" Reid smiled and placed a kiss on his forehead. "I'm going for a shower okay" Mitsuki nodded. Reid headed over to the draws to pick up a towel, and when he did he say a tiny red sat behind the arrangement of things on top of the draws. Reid didn't draw attention to it for he knew exactly what it was.

He could feel his blood begin to boil, he could feel his face getting hot with anger, he couldn't believe they didn't that too him, they've been watching him, spying on him. Reid picked up a fresh towel and walked into the bathroom, when he was out sight line of the camera, he gestured for Mitsuki to follow after him. Once both in the bathroom, Reid punched a wall. Mitsuki jumped back in shocked, he'd never see Spencer get like this before.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry it's not you"

"What's happened?" Mitsuki stepped closer, grabbing hold of Reid's bad hand, and giving it a kiss.

"They've been spying on me?"

"Who?"

"My team mates" Mitsuki was shocked.

"Are you sure?"

"There's a camera on top of the Chester draws" Reid couldn't stay still, he had never felt so angry before, he wanted to scream, cry and laugh, he was all over the place. "You're joking right?" Mitsuki himself was angry, they were meant to be his friends. "I can't!" Reid pushed Mitsuki's hands away and stormed out of the bathroom, Mitsuki hot on his heels. Reid wanted to kill someone, he had so much hate and anger inside him, but then he just suddenly stopped. "What's wrong?"

"If there watching me then..."

"Then what?"

"They saw us" Mitsuki knew what he was on about, and just bowed his head. Reid didn't want to do now, they know he's gay. But Reid just saw red, 'Fuck it' he thought, if they know he's gay then there isn't anything else to lose. Reid opened the door and without knocking barged into Morgan and Hotch's room. "Enjoying the show".


	11. Reid's Done

They all watched their team mate on screen, but not one of them realized he wasn't in frame anymore and before they knew it. "Enjoying the show" Reid was stood in the door way, his face red with anger. They all jumped, not knowing what to say there all starred at Reid. Reid was literally just standing there only wearing his lounge pants, upper body free of clothing, you could the scratches, hickeys and such from the rough night. But what Reid forgot was the deep purple scars sat on his wrists and up his arms. They didn't say anything. He was literally a tall skinny ball of anger. "Reid let me explain" Hotch moved away from the table and closer to Reid.

"What's there to explain?" Lines appeared on the top of Reid's brow, his fist clenched by his side. "How many?" Hotch didn't say anything. "HOW MANY?" Reid shouted which startled everyone, its rare they see Reid angry, let alone shout.

"5"

"Are you fucking with me right now?" Reid bite his lip, placed his hand on the back of his neck and moved on spot, trying to calm himself down. "And you all knew about this?" Reid was speechless, it head was wasn't clear, normally it would take him 1.4 seconds to process information, but he couldn't think straight. Nothing was clear, he tried to think of logical explanations to why they would have done this, but nothing came to mind. He trusted them. "Reid it's no one else's fault but mine" Hotch was only 4ft away from Reid now.

"So, what? Guess you saw everything then? Pervert"

"Reid calm down!" Reid moved closer to Hotch, almost getting in his face.

"Don't you dare tell me to calm down Aaron!" Reid was scary. "There are five cameras in my room and your all sat in here watching as if I was in a fucking movie!"

"Reid there in there for your own safety" Reid huffed. "The unsub breaks into the victim's homes, rapes them, beats them before killing them...do you honestly think we'd make you a target and not make sure your safe?"

"Don't bullshit me Aaron...why didn't you just tell me about them then?" Hotch stumbled, he didn't know how to reply, Reid was mad already. "ANSWER ME HOTCH!"

"I wanted to make sure you weren't back on drugs! Okay!" Reid's eyes widened. He was shocked, Hotch was spying on him to see if he's on drug, why didn't he believe when he told him?

"What?" Reid was shaking in anger, and without a thought, Reid darted at Hotch, Rossi and Morgan got in the way just in time and pulled him back. "FUCK YOU AARON! FUCK YOU! I TOLD YOU I WASN'T ON DRUGS AGAIN YOU'RE MEANT TO FUCKING TRUST ME YOU DICK" Reid was going insane, the girls moved away, JJ had tears in her eyes and so did Garcia, Reid was scaring them, for the first time, they were terrified of Spencer. Reid broke free from Morgan and Rossi's grasp. "I told you I wasn't back on drugs, but god to I fucking want too!" The girls hated seeing Reid like this. "I miss that feeling of being high and being pain free!"

"Do just enjoy hurting yourself Reid because that's what it looks like" Morgan cut in this time, he hated seeing the kid like this, seeing what he's done to himself.

"Tobias started it!"

"Did he start those as well?" Morgan pointed to the scars the roamed Reid's arms. He looked down and panicked completely forgetting to put on a top. He tried to fold, his arms but what use was that know he had been stood there for the past 5 minutes they would have saw them. "That's none for business Derek"

"Why do you do this to yourself Reid? I don't understand"

"Shut the fuck up Morgan"

"Why am I hitting a nerve Reid? Were just here to help you"

"Help me?" Reid gave a fake laugh. "Okay then where the fuck was you when I was struggling? When I was dosing myself up with Dauladid nearly every night? Where the fuck was you when I practically cried out for help? You wanna know why I do this to myself because I'm alone, because it's either this or kill myself" Everyone was taken back by what was coming out of Reid's mouth, the girls just let their tears rolled down their faces, everyone had so much to say yet it was so quite. "Instead of asking, you put cameras in my apartment and watch me, see if I get 'high' again"

"We did it to protect you"

"Protect me? Sat in here watching my everyone move, protecting me is it?"

"Reid..."

"Did you see?" Reid didn't care anymore, he was so angry he didn't know where to cry or punch something, he didn't care about anything anymore.

"See what?" Morgan asked.

"Me and Mitsuki" Reid's voice was raw and husky from where he had been shouting so much, that and he had to try and hold back the tears. "Yeah"

"Let me guess that's why you're all in here? Wanting to watch little faggot Reid fuck some guy"

"Reid enough!"

"Get you off does it Hotch? Watching two men touch each other, kiss and fuck...do you like that Hotch?" Reid never even saw it coming, one moment he was stood up next thing he knows he's lying on the floor, face throbbing. He took a moment to come back around, he looked up to see Hotch standing over him, everyone looking shocked. "What the fuck Hotch!" Rossi gestured a hand out to help him up, Rossi was the only one Reid wasn't mad at, he was a little but Rossi has been the only one to understand him these days.

"We did it to protect you..."

"How's watching me fuck a guy protecting me?" At this point no one was looking at Reid but behind him. In the doorway stood Mitsuki, looking nervous.

"Spence..." Reid looked at him and for some reason he could feel his anger begin to die down. "Just leave it"

"How can I leave it, they've been spying on us"

"Then I hope they got as good view of your ass as I did...you promised me breakfast" Emily tried to hide the snigger, but Reid noticed and darted her a dirty look. Reid just looked at him, he couldn't be bothered with them anymore, his trust for the has gone and he couldn't stand to see their faces. "I'm finishing this case then I'm handing in my letter of resignation"

"Spence you can't" JJ spoke up, and move towards Reid. "You can't leave"

"Jennifer, I can't trust you guys anymore, you invade my privacy and put me in harms away without asking me how I feel about it"

"But you in harm's way?" Asked Hotch.

"Aaron I'm a faggot pretending to be a faggot to catch a killer who is raping, mutilating and murdering faggots...how's that not putting me in harm's way?" Reid didn't want to see or hear them anymore, he was done, tiered.

"How were we meant to know Reid? We're not mind readers"

"I'm done here Aaron, I'll see you at the station at 12" Reid said no more he just walked away, everyone stared after him, one tried to stop him, they understood why he was mad, they had all betrayed his trust and now the kids leaving. "Now what do we do Hotch? Because we just lost one of our most important members" Rossi was pissed, he cared a lot about Spencer, he wanted to look after the kid like Gideon did, watch over him and protect him, fat lot of good he's done. Rossi left, leaving Morgan, Hotch and the girls.

Reid stormed back into his apartment, slamming the door so hard it rattled. Mitsuki just sat by and watched Reid unfold into a ball of anger and rage. Reid just stood there in the middle of room, you can see his body change with his emotions. He was tense all over, his fists turning white at the knuckles, and shoulders raised.

After a few moments, his body just relaxed and he finally moved from the spot where he's been stood for the past 5 minutes. "Spence?" Reid didn't say anything, he just simply walked over to the table, picked up his packet of smokes and lit one up. Reid took in one big breath and sighed, smoke leaking from his lungs. Mitsuki walked over to him, reaching his hand out to place on his shoulder, but before he could Reid moved away, like he knew what Mitsuki was going to do. "I think it's best if you went home" Reid's tone was harsh.

"Spencer?"

"I'm sorry, I'll call you later" Reid didn't even turn to look at him, he kept facing the window smoking his cigarette. Mitsuki held down the lump in his throat, he knows it's not his fault, he knows its because of his team. He hated seeing Spencer in pain, but if this is what he wants he isn't going to force his way in, Reid will come to him when he is ready.

Mitsuki picked up his coat and bag, giving one last glance at Spencer before he closed the door.

The moment the door closed, Reid let out breath he had been holding, the one that kept his tears from falling. But the moment that door closed the tears fell, and fell fast. Reid put out his cigarette in the ashtray residing on the table, he stood there a moment before he picked up the glass bowl and throwing it at the wall. The bowl shattered into a thousand tiny pieces, the ear piercing crash echoed through the apartment. Reid didn't stop there, going on a rampage smashing anything in his path from plates on the side, glasses, throwing books and paper work around the room.

The room was a complete state, looking as if a bomb had dropped, Reid stood in the middle of it all. His chest raising and falling in anger, tears staining his face. He knotted his fingers into his brown locks before falling to the ground with a loud thud, pain shot through his knees, he winced in pain. But he didn't care, the humiliation was more painful then this. And once again the tears rain free.

Mitsuki's hand covered his mouth as he tried to hide the sound of his crying, his back lent again Spencer's doors, hearing him cry, hearing the pain he was in, hurt Mitsuki. Mitsuki could feel his chest tighten, all he wanted was to hold him, hold him tight and tell him everything was going to be okay, but he couldn't he knew Spencer needed space, there was nothing he could do for him.

The monitors lit up the room, watching everything unfold. They all watched as Reid changed from a angry drive mess to an emotional reck within minutes. "What have we done Hotch"


	12. One moment everything was okay

Before Reid knew it, it was midnight. The room looked eerie as the moon shone throw the window, illuminating only parts of the room, giving life to everything it touched. The plant leaves looked as if they were fingers, the coat stand looked as if a person was stood watching in the corner of the room. Reid wasn't fully with it to be creeped out, as much as he was terrified of the dark, and Morgan made sure to take the mick out of him for it too.

Reid hauled himself up off the floor, his legs were weak, eyes heavy. He ran his fingers through his hair, combing back. He took the packet of smokes off the table, lighting it up, he breathed out as if it was the first time he has breathed in days. He held that cigarette in between his lips as he turns on his phone. The screen blinding him as he his eyes try and readjust to the harsh light. Nothing. But one simple text.

 _ ** **Mitsuki****_

 _I never left._

Reid looked up and turned his head to the door, he opened it up to reveal a sleepy Mitsuki curled up in a ball opposite the door. His hair hung loosely, covering his face completely. Reid bent down, pushing his hair back and tucking it behind his ear. Reid instantly felt less angry, Mitsuki looked so peaceful, like he had no problems, he smiled slightly which made one side of Reid's lip rise into a small smile.

JJ, Penelope and Rossi were the only ones still awake. Emily was curled up on the sofa, Hotch and Morgan were laid flat out in there beds, still fully clothed. The 3 of them were all sat around the table drinking coffee. JJ turned around as she heard the Reid's door open, the others all looked too. "Reid?" Asked Rossi.

"I'll have a look" JJ headed towards the door, a look through the peep hole. She could see Reid crouched down in front of the young man asleep on the hallway floor. She watched as he stroked his face with the back of his hand, she watched as she saw how he cared for him, how he was so gentle as he tucked his hair behind his ear. She smiled. "Is it him?" Asked Penelope. She turned and nodded. Garcia gave a small little smile. JJ turned looking back through the peep hole. Mitsuki stirred, slowly waking, and she finally heard Reid. "Hey, what are you doing out here?"

"I couldn't leave you knowing you were in pain" There eyes locked, Mitsuki's eye's were soft, sleepy but Reid could see the love in them, he could see the spark that rose when he saw Reid. "I'm sorry I told you to leave"

"It's okay, I understood why you did" Mitsuki sat up, Reid held out his hand and Mitsuki reached out, Reid's hand were warm, soft, not the hands you would expect of an FBI agent. Reid helped him up and the pair stood parallel to one another. JJ continued to look through the whole, spying on Reid wasn't the right thing to do at this time, but she was worried about him, she wanted to go out there, apologise, but that could just make matters much worse. Reid has been mad at her before but never like this, she had destroyed all trust he had for her, and it was killing her. Reid was like a little brother to her, knowing that he probably hated her now, broke her heart.

"Stay with me tonight" Spencer asked. Mitsuki smiled, then nodded. They entwined there fingers and Reid lead him into the apartment. JJ moved away from the door, she was so happy for him, happy that he finally had someone who he cared for and who cared for him. She was never bothered with that fact that he was gay, she always had her suspicions, looking back there was one time when he came round and what he said felt as if he was trying to tell her he didn't feel the same about women that most men did, but she was too busy sorting out Henry to really hear what he was saying. If she had listen to him then, maybe none of this would of happened, but she couldn't be 100% sure and there was no point blaming herself because it will only upset her further. "What happened?"

"It seems Mitsuki never left"

"Huh?"

"Mitsuki was asleep outside Spence's door, it seems he didn't want to leave him"

"Awwwhhh" Penelope awh'd as she cupped her hands in front of her chest.

"He's a good one that kid, Reid got lucky" Rossi said as he sipped on his strong black coffee.

"Oh yeah that's right, you knew about this and didn't say anything" Penelope looked at him, JJ sat back down at the table and too was intrigued on how Rossi knew. "So what happened? Why didn't you say anything?"

"Because it wasn't my place to, the kid asked me not to say anything"

"Well you can tell us now cant you?"

"I caught them" The pair looked puzzled. "When we went to go visit the new crime scene, I saw Reid walk off down some alley so I followed him, and well caught him and Mitsuki kissing"

"OOOOHH mama like" Garcia was lightly jumping up and down in her seat, trying not to wake the other sleeping agents. "Then what?"

"Nothing really, I just let him know that I was happy for him and that I didn't care, I still love the kid no matter who he loves"

"Oh Rossi, who knew"

"Who knew what?"

"That you were such a softie" The girls laughed (quietly) as Rossi smiled, taking the last slip of his drink. "Right, sleep. We are still on a case" The girls nodded. Rossi slept in the armchair allowing the girls to share the spare bed.

When morning finally came, Reid didn't want to leave the comfort of the bed. He wanted to stay curled up with Mitsuki in his arms, he wanted to forget about the events of last night, wished it never happened. But it did. Reid looked down at Mitsuki and smiled, he looked so cute when he slept, his hair flopped in front of his face, his mouth slightly agape. Reid carefully lifted Mitsuki's arm, moving out from underneath him, trying not to wake him. He sat on the end edge of the bed, head in hands, so many thoughts swirled around his brain, he couldn't keep a single thought in his head for more then 4 seconds. He tried to distract his brain from the events of last night, but there faces just kept appearing, what he said and what he told them.

Reid sucked in his breath, pushed his hair back and got up. Coffee, he needed coffee. He headed out of the bedroom, Mitsuki still sleeping soundlessly. Reid tried to be as quiet as he could in the kitchen, making sure not the wake him. He put on the coffee, picked up his smokes and went out on the patio. The morning air was cold on Reid's bare chest, goose bumps rose on his arms, his body shivering. Reid felt calm, there was something about having a cigarette in the morning that calmed his nerves. If this was a few months ago, Reid would have been dosing himself up with Dilaudid, instead of dealing with his problems he would just simply forget them.

Reid, just finishing his smoke when someone knocked at his door, Reid sighed, put out his cigarette and went inside. As he walked past the bedroom he saw Mitsuki was still sound asleep. Reid looked through the peephole, rolling his eyes back. He opened the door. "What do you want JJ?" Reid walked away leaving the door open, indicating that JJ could come in.

"I wanted to check up on you, see if you're okay"

"Well you've done it, so you can go now" Reid poured the boiling hot coffee into 2 mugs, what JJ thought was for her was actually for Mitsuki. "Spence please, don't be like this"

"Like what JJ?" Reid looked at her. "Pissed of that my friends betrayed my trust. Angry that you sat at watched me because you wanted to see if I was taking drugs"

"I had no part in this"

"BUT YOU STILL WATCHED! YOU STILL DIDN'T TELL ME JENNIFER"

"I couldn't"

"You couldn't or you wouldn't"

"No I couldn't" JJ wanted to cry, she wanted to hug him and beg for his forgiveness, but she knew it would take a lot more then that to gain his trust back again. "Spence, I'm sorry okay, I didn't want no part in this, I wanted to say something but deep down I was worried too"

"Then why didn't you just come and asked me? You know I wouldn't lie to you"

"Spence you've been lying to me for years" Right at that moment, Mitsuki walks out the bedroom, dazed and half dressed. "Oh sorry, I didn't realise you had company"

"It's okay, coffee?" Reid smiled at him, JJ could see this instant change in Reid, his body relaxed, and the feel in the room changed. Reid handed Mitsuki a cup as he sat down at the table opening his pack of smokes taking one out. "You don't mind do you?" Aiming the question at JJ.

"No, No go ahead" and Mitsuki did, taking his lighter and sparking up.

"Look JJ, I know you didn't intend on doing this to hurt me, but you did"

"Spence, I know what I've done cannot be forgiven, but..."

"I've already forgiven you" JJ looked at him confused, same with Mitsuki.

"What do you mean?"

"You came over here, knowing I was mad, but you still came over and apologised. You're the only one who has done that" Reid walked closer to her, handing her a cup of coffee and smiled.

"So wait, you're not mad at me anymore"

"No. I am still mad at you, I just, don't blame you" Reid didn't have to say anymore, JJ pulled him in and hugged him tightly, tears swelling up in her eyes.

"Thank you Spence. I am so sorry" Reid tucked his head in her neck, and wrapped his arms around her. "I'm so sorry".

"Stop okay" Reid pulled away and gave her a small smile. "I knew you were only looking out for me" Mitsuki watched the pair. Reid couldn't stay mad at JJ for long, he was still really pissed at her, but knew she wouldn't do anything without thinking of Reid in her best interest. "I'm still mad at you though" She gave him a sad smile.

"You know you're in trouble with Hotch for not turning up to work yesterday right"

"Fuck Hotch"

"Spence!"

"No JJ. How the hell can I face them after what they did...after what they saw"

"Spence you did nothing wrong, okay" JJ reached out for him and help his arm.

"JJ they watched me have sex with Mitsuki, how is there nothing wrong with that"

"Because there's nothing wrong being who you are" Reid just looked at her, Mitsuki too. None of his friends had been this understanding when he came out to them, instead they shunned him, bullied and harassed him. His parents were "Okay" with it but he never had this level of comfort. "Spence, you're gay so what. Doesn't make you any lesser or a person"

"JJ I know that but they literally saw me fuck him" JJ just laughed, Reid has always been awkward when it came to talking about his personal life, sex and girls, and hearing Reid so openly talk about it felt weird to JJ. "Who knew Dr Spencer Reid had a secret side" JJ winked and started laughing, Reid just nudged her.


	13. And then it wasn't

Over the course of the day, JJ had stayed with Reid and Mitsuki headed home to pick up a few things as he was going to be staying with Reid for a while. They had one of the officers to escort him home, the Unsub had targeted him, Reid couldn't risk anything happening to him.

JJ and Reid were sat at the kitchen table both had tall glasses in their hands filled with a red liquid; wine. Sometimes they would love and enjoy themselves, other times they will have serious discussions about things. Reid had told JJ about his experience in high school when he came out and how he didn't want the same reaction from this team mates, he didn't want to ruin things. He told her about his first boyfriend and how he turned out to be a complete freak, who enjoyed feet way to much, Reid squirmed at the thought of it.

JJ told him about Henry and the few problems she had been having with Will, even they had sorted it, she still wanted to fill him in as the girls know, she wanted him to know also.

More and more time had past, and more and more Reid began to panic. Mitsuki hadn't called or text him, he had been gone nearly 2 hours already and he only lives 20 minutes down the road. Reid was shaking, he knew he felt more then just 'Like' towards Mitsuki, he knew his feelings were developing at a rapid pace, but never has he experience such fear, not knowing where he was, not knowing if he was safe or not was terrifying him. "Spence what's wrong" Reid was looking at his watch.

"2 Hours"

"What?"

"Mitsuki has been gone nearly 2 hours" JJ looked at him, too she started to worry, but she didn't want Reid to see, if he saw she was worried to then it will make matters worse. "It's okay there's probably just traffic"

"JJ, he would have phoned me"

"Okay, look. I'll call the attending officer, see if everything was okay" JJ stood up, taking her phone out from her pocket. The phone rang...and rang...and rang. No answer. JJ just look at Reid. She tried again, and the same thing. Ring...ring...ring. Panic filled JJ, she looked at Reid and he knew, he knew something was wrong. Reid jumped up quickly, grabbing his coat and car keys. "Spencer what are you doing?"

"Going to find him" JJ didn't have time to tell him to go or not to go, she didn't have time to get the others, instead she just ran out after him.

It was rare for Reid to drive, when he did he was careful, but not now. Now he was racing down the streets, swerving in and out of other cars, sirens blaring alerting people around him. Letting them know what there was danger, letting them know his boyfriend could be in serve danger. "What are you doing?" Reid looked over to JJ.

"Calling Hotch?"

"Why?" Reid didn't want that, he didn't want Hotch there, after everything, he hated him. He didn't want him near Mitsuki. Because of him Mitsuki could he in terrible trouble. "He can help Spence! I know he isn't exactly in you're good books at the moment but he is still our boss"

"Fine!" Reid didn't even look at her. "But could you wait until we know there is definitely something wrong" JJ nodded and placed the phone back into her pocket.

"Spence, don't panic okay. I'm sure he's completely fine, maybe his phone has just died"

"If it died JJ how was I able to ring him earlier?" JJ didn't say anything, nothing she was telling him was making him feel any better. At this moment in the time the only thing they could do was hurry up and get to Mitsuki's house so they can know for definite. After driving for another 5 minutes they finally pull up outside Mitsuki's apartment complex. It was a nice looking place, in a low risk area, if someone came here that wasn't from around here, people would know.

Reid ran out the car and straight through the double doors, passing the reception. "Oi where do you think you're going" The guy shouted to Reid, but Reid just ignored him and carried on running, he didn't want to stop, he wanted to find him. "OI!" The guy came out from the desk and was about to go after Reid until JJ finally caught up to him. "I'm really sorry" JJ flashed him her badge. "Were from the FBI"

"Oh my apologise agent" He stepped back and let her pass, she chased after Reid but had no idea where on earth he had gone. She ran up the stairs and checked every floor. She finally found him, stood, starring at one of the doors. JJ walked closer and she could see what got him. Mitsuki's door was wide open and the sight inside looked as if a bomb had gone off. A small puddle of blood soaked into the cream carpets, boxes containing different items exploded out everywhere. "Spence" JJ put her hand on his shoulder, the light caught Reid's face and she saw the tear roll down his cheek. "You can call Hotch now".

Mitsuki's head was spinning, he opened his eyes but saw nothing but haze, a faint buzzing ran through his ears. He tried to move but his whole body felt like led, he turned his head and nausea over took him, it was like he had drunk a shit tone and tried to go to sleep. After a few moments, his vision slowly began to defog, and the buzzing become quite enough he can here enough. He looked around, still feeling nausea's; he was alone.

The room was lit only by candle light, the orangey glow cast dark shadows on everything it touched, making the room look more and more sinister. A deep burning pain shot through his arm when he tried to move. Dirty old ropes gripped onto his wrist, when he tried to pull a sharp pain shot through his arm, he could see where blood, his blood, had dried on the ropes. He started to breath faster, his chest rising and falling quicker, panic began to take over. He tried to calm himself down, he tried to think of things that made him happy, tried to get out of his head but nothing was working, his body was shaking in fear, tears rolled down his cheeks. He quickly turned as best he could throwing up all over the side of the bed.

Mitsuki was finally able to settle himself, he threw up whatever was left in his stomach and to be honest it was much. What had left like forever was only a few moment from waking up to hearing footsteps approach the room. Mitsuki didn't know what to do, cry out for help or keep quite. He tried both, but when he tried to scream and cry nothing escaped his throat, only silence fell. Then he was there, the man was tall, dark haired with a sun-kissed tan. His face looked young but his eyes, old. He wasn't skinny, nor fat, but wasn't muscly either, but a cross between the three. Mitsuki's breathing once again became rapid, at some points he actually forgot to breath, and after a few moments he would draw in a sharp, long breath. "Hello" The mans voice was smooth and deep, with a slight accent. Mitsuki couldn't really put accents to a state, he only really heard the New Yorker and Washington accents, this was alien to him.

"W-w-who are you?" Mitsuki stuttered. But he never expected the answer that was to fall from the kidnappers lips. "I am God".

"Reid?" It was Rossi. The team had finally got to Mitsuki's apartment, forensic officers were already inside, Reid didn't even notice, he just stood there. Reid didn't even look at him, it was like he was there but no body was home. "Spencer" Rossi placed his hand on Reid's shoulder causing the young doctor to jump. "Are you okay?" Reid just looked at him with sad eyes, Rossi was the first to find out about the two, and some how he feels Reid's pain. "It's my fault...it's all my fault" Reid started to panic, knotting his fingers in his hair.

"Reid! Reid! Calm down" Rossi held Reid's wrists, pulling his hands away from his hair and back down the side of him. "This is not you're fault, do you hear me. None of this is". Rossi looked over to Hotch, who was watching the pair, watching Reid in this state, something he has never done before. Reid rarely shows his feelings and when he does everyone knows about it, but this, this was something completely different, in the years Reid had worked for him, he had never seen him get in such a state.

"Rossi, I left him, I let him come back alone knowing he was in danger. I should have gone with him!"

"Reid what could you have done that the officer couldn't?"

"I could have protected him" Rossi gave a Reid a sad look, he reached into his pocket and slyly pulled out a packet of smokes. "Let's go get some fresh air. There's nothing we can do up here for the moment" Reid nodded and followed David to the stairs.

Mitsuki watched as the man walked towards him, the words 'I am God' kept running around his head, the words scared him. The man pulled out a knife, Mitsuki's heart began to race, this was it, this was the moment he was going to die. "Are you going to behave?" Mitsuki looked confused. The man just stared at him, holding up the knife. Mitsuki nodded, and the man bent down and cut the ropes around Mitsuki's wrists, but not the ones around his ankles. "There staying, don't want you running away now do we" Mitsuki starred at him as he rubbed his sore wrists in his palms. The man at the end of the bed, Mitsuki sat up watching him.

"Why am I here?" Mitsuki said with a shaky voice.

"Because I need you, that's why" He smiled. The smile wasn't like a normal one, this was this thing of nightmares, the ones you see painted onto a clown, the ones you see though the blackest of nights watching you, this was the smile of a psychopath. "What f-for?"

"You'll find out soon enough" He spoke not dropping the smile.

"It was you who killed them...wasn't it?" The smile dropped and sat emotionless. "Why?"

"Because the were sinners, dirty, diseased people who plague this world" Mitsuki wanted to draw away but the restraints meant he couldn't. "And what do you do with diseases?" He looked at Mitsuki. "You get rid of them" Mitsuki was one of those 'Diseased' people, but why wasn't he killing him. So many questions ran around his head, but none he could answer. He need Spencer, his Spencer. "But why do you need me?"

"Because you know him"

"Him who?"

"Dr Spencer Reid" Mitsuki's eyes widened. 'What does he want with Spence?'

Spencer and Rossi came up after finishing their smoke, the smell wrapped around them like a coat. Reid saw JJ stood by the door, when she saw them coming she headed straight towards them. "JJ?" Reid's voice was quiet and shaky.

"They've found a body" Reid's eye widened, fear shot through him, his body shock as if a cold hand had grabbed him. "It's not Mitsuki" In just a few seconds Reid went through a hundred different emotions all at once, fear, worry, sadness and relief. Reid darted past her, about to walk in the apartment. "There is something though" JJ handed Spencer a picture. Once again, the lump in his throat was back, the tears swelled up in his eyes, his heart felt as if it had stopped, he wanted to throw up. The picture showed Mitsuki tied to a bed, wrists bloody, bruises marked his body, he was out, either sleeping or knocked out, Reid couldn't tell. But he knew In that second, there were just feelings filling up inside him. Hate and Love.


	14. God be they witness

Mitsuki was baffled, what did the unsub want with Reid so much. It wasn't until the unsub got closer that Mitsuki recognised him to be the one that attcked him and tried to rape him. He didn't want to show he was afraid, because if he did it will be a sign of weakness and he'll proabbly get killed off sooner. "What do you want with Spencer?"

"I want to help him, like I'm going to help you" Mitsuki couldn't make sense anything he was saying, does he mean killing us is going to help us? Rid us of our 'Disease'? Mitsuki watched him, wanted to see if there was anything he could use to get to him, an injury, a tick, something, anything, he didn't care what. He wanted out. "When I saw you two sat at the bar, you made me feel sick" He was sat rather close to Mitsuki, close enough he could smell his cheap, nasty aftershave. "Watching you two kiss, touch each other it was unnatural" He punched his leg, sudden rage built inside him, Mitsuki couldn't get anymore scared than he already was. "So when I followed, watched you, I found out who and what he was. He was a Dr" Mitsuki looked at him with a confused expression plastered over his face.

"He could help me get rid of the dieseased" He smiled. A sinister smile. "I will cure him, make him see that he is sinning, but God be may witness, he can change and so can you" He looked at Mitsuki. "I can help you both. Once he is cleansed, we can begin this amazing journey together, God's journey, and together we can do God's bidding" He stood up, voice was raising as if he thought God could actually hear him. Mitsuki knew there was no such thing as God, but he knew if he deined anything he said, he would be killed.

"But you called yourself God? Are you God?" He looked at him.

"I am God's healper, all helpers of God take on his spirt to walk agmoust the mundanes, showing them right from wrong, helping them along there path or righteouness" This guy is fucking nuts, Mitsuki thought.

"But what can Spencer do?" He was afraid to ask that question in fear on what he might say.

"He is a Dr, he knows how to heal people, he can help me" Mitsuki knew that that wasn't the type of Dr Spencer was, yes he had the title of 'Dr' but not the medicinal kind, just the one with a stupid amount of PHD's. "What' your name?" The guy looked at Mitsuki.

"God's children do not share there name"

"But what do I call you?"

"You may call me Jehovah" Mitsuki nodded. "Now, you need to rest, you injuries won't heal themselves.

"You not going to hurt me?" Stupid question Mitsuki, he thought, beating himself up in his head.

"Not yet" He walked out, leaving Mitsuki alone and terrifed that the next time he came back could be the last time alive.

Spencer stood over the blood covered body, it was the officer who was looking after Mitsuki. Deep lacerations covered his body, a pool of blood surrounding him. This was mass overkill, the killer went on a frenzy, it is nothing like his previous kills, this felt almost personal, but why. So many questions swam through Reid's mind and yet it was also empty. He couldn't stop thinking about Mitsuki, knowing he was with 'that' man. Reid felt his chest tighten, his heart began to race, breathing grew harder and harder, what was going on? Reid's eyes darted from left to right, he gripped his t-shirt tightly as if he was clawing away at his chest. Everything was spinning, darkness grew in the corner of his eyes, he saw JJ walked hastily towards him before he felt his body hit the floor with force. "Spence". That was all Reid heard before he blackout.

When Reid finally woke up, a few hours had passed. Reid woke up in a panic. "Hey! Hey! Calm down kid" It was Rossi. Reid looked around the room, he was back at his apartment. "Mitsuki!"

"Don't worry, we're doing everything we can"

"I need to find him" Reid tried to get up, but when he did, he was taken over with nausea. He sat down as quickly as he got up. "Where is he?"

"We still don't know that yet kiddo"

"Then why are you just sat here? Shouldn't you be trying to find him?" Reid looked Rossi dead in the eyes, he will filled with anger, rage and fear, and Rossi could see it all. "Kid, everyone is on it, there doing all they can, but what help are we? You can't even stand up and I am not going to leave you all alone now am I?" Reid looked Rossi, he knew it was the right thing and Rossi had a reason for doing everything, but just sitting there, he felt as if he was being useless, like he's doing nothing to help Mitsuki. "Look kid, you are no use to them in this state, the best thing you can do for Mitsuki now, is it rest, get better, then find that son of a bitch" Rossi smiled at Reid, a supportive smile, and Reid gave him a gentle nod in return.

Mitsuki was curled up in a ball, his stomach felt as if it was going to be ripped out, hunger was consuming him. He led there on the bed, staring into thin air. Eye's red raw from hours of crying, tear stains snaked his face, he had cried so much there was nothing left. Hours had past, he had no idea how long he had been there for but it felt like days.

Like that, he heard him, his footsteps echoed thought out the room, at this point Mitsuki was guessing he was in a basement, because the footsteps were coming from above. He wanted to throw up, but all that came up was an unpleasant sound, his stomach was completely empty.

He was lent over the side of the bed and didn't even hear the door open. "Hungary are we?" Mitsuki looked round quickly and scuttled further back on the bed. He raised his head, he didn't know what he noticed first, the sight or the sound? Jehovah was holding a plate of hot food, Mitsuki felt his stomach tighten, and mouth water. Jehovah smiled. "Do you want it?" Mitsuki didn't answer him. "Of course you do, you've been here 14 hours now, you must be starving" Has he really been here that long? Mitsuki thought. Mitsuki nodded.

He went to hand Mitsuki the food, he reached out to grab it before Jehovah pulled it back again. "First, you have to do something for me" He looked at Mitsuki and placed the plate of hot food on the desk opposite the bed.

2 hours had past, Reid was well and back at the station, so were all the team. "Garcia, were you able to pull up anything from the photo?" asked Hotch.

"No sir, no prints" Hotch was getting frustrated, they have nothing, no clues, no leads, they are no further then they were a few weeks ago. Now, he has a live hostage, and at this rate they will never find him. "Excuse me, Agent Hotchner"

"Yes, what is it?"

"This was just delivered to the station" In the officers hand was a brown package, no bigger than A5, with the words 'Spencer' written across it in thick black ink. "Thank you" Aaron took the package out off his hand and looked at Reid. He knew it couldn't be good. He gave the package to Reid and he opened it. Inside was a disk...just a disk, on the disk was the words 'Play me'. "Garcia, can you?" she nodded as he handed her the disk.

As Garcia put in the disk, Reid's heart began to race, he knew it wasn't anything good, he didn't know what to expect, then a picture came up on screen. Mitsuki. Reid's eyes widened, on screen was Mitsuki, battered and bruised, head bent down as he was tied to a chair. "Mitsuki" Everyone was looking at the screen, it looked as if it was just a picture, then a voice echoed. "Say hello Mitsuki" Mitsuki looked up, purple bruising sat under his eye, on his lip and dried blood sat around his face. Reid wanted to cry, but he couldn't, he held back the lump in his throat.

"He-ello" His voice was cracked and dry.

"Now do as we said" The mans voice was harsh, but soft, he sounded older, but not too old. Mitsuki looked in the direction off the camera, but not at the camera, he was reading something. The team all looked at the screen, Reid in front next to Hotch, behind him stood Morgan, Emily, JJ, Rossi and Garcia was sat at the desk.

"He has been watching, and he has come, he stands before us all as a saviour, as a protector. He keeps the good safe and punishes the evil. I am part of that evil, I am part of the diseased. Jehovah has come, he is here to cleanse me, but he cannot do it alone. Spencer Reid, he calls for you, you must come to his side and cleanse yourself from evil, only then will you help him on his mission of good and bad" Mitsuki stopped and looked at the screen, tears formed in his eyes. "Why does he want Spencer?" asked Garcia.

"That's for us to find out" They looked back at the screen just as Mitsuki starts to talk again.

"I have yet to be cleansed of my crimes, I must be p-punished" As Mitsuki spoke those words, he bowed his head. "Head up boy!" The man shouted.

"I-I Mu-sst be punished, I am filth, dirt, and diseased. For that I will pay my price, I will give my-sself to Jehovah. I will become good" Mitsuki finished, but before he had time to react, the man from behind the camera walked towards him. In his hand a baseball bat, he swung it behind him, just missing the camera, and brought it down on Mitsuki. "STOOOP!" Reid shouted, everyone looked at him then the screen, watched as he raised the bat and brought it back down again, and again and again. Mitsuki screamed, his cries filled the room, cries of pain. "SPEENCER!" Reid couldn't move, he was fixed to his spot, to be honest what could he do it was a recording, nothing more.

Then, everything fell silent, the only sound came from the bat as it hit the hard floor. They watched as the man hoovered over the lifeless body of Mitsuki, he turned and faced the camera, seeing him for the first time. "Dr Spencer Reid" He spoke such words in such an eerily way. "If you want to save you're lovers life come to the address I have given you" Hotch picked up the packet, inside was another photo, 'How could Spencer miss this' Hotch thought. It was a photo of Mitsuki, bloody, bruised. His eyes widened. "What is it Hotch?" Hotch said nothing but looked at the photo. "AARON!" Reid shouted. He said nothing just handed Reid the image.

Reid looked at the bloody, bruised Mitsuki, but not only that his tshirt had been removed and the word 'FAG' was carved into his abdomen. Reid wanted to throw up, he felt his stomach chern as if he was on a boat. He turned the photo over and written '66 Crews Lane - Come alone'. Reid grabbed his jacket and darted towards the door. "Where are you going?"

"Where do you think"

"Reid you're not going on you're own"

"I have to Hotch, I have too" Morgan was the one to pick up the picture next.

"66 Crews Lan - Come alone"Morgan looked up. "As hell you are".


	15. You're my Brother

"Dude, you can't go on you're own" Morgan was still holding on to the picture.

"Don't tell me what to do Morgan" Reid's face had tightened in anger, he was still mad at Morgan, mad at them all in fact. Reid didn't know if he could ever forgive them.

"I care about you man and you know that!"

"Do I Morgan? Because I don't think you do"

"What's that supposed to mean?" Morgan didn't like that comment, he thought that after everything, Reid maybe wouldn't be as mad at him.

"You're fucking with me right?" Reid just stared, he didn't even blink, if anything it was if he'd turned into Hotch. Reid wasn't Reid, he wasn't his shy awkward self, he was irritable, blunt and always angry. It had been nearly 2 days since the incident, no one has said anything, but Reid was definitely still holding a grudge. "Reid, we said we're sorry. How long are you going to be angry for?"

"You think a couple of days I'll just forget about it? You destroyed all trust I ever had for you, I'll never stop being mad" They were all looking at Reid, his face wiped of emotions. But his eye's were sad.

"Come on man, don't you think all this has gone on too long?"

"Just because you are helping me find Mitsuki, doesn't mean I've forgiven you" Reid looked at them all. "I'm still leaving" As he said that he headed towards the door.

"Spence you can't just leave" JJ looked at him with sad eyes, Reid had always been her brother, and losing him will hurt just as much as when she lost her sister. "You're our family" Reid turns back to them as he stood in the doorway.

"Yeah of course, because family spy on each other to double check there not taking drugs, but instead they all sit around and watch as there 'family' shares a moment between someone they like" Reid wanted to cry, but he also wanted to punch a wall repeated until his knuckles became redraw and bled. "You took away the courage I was building up to finally come out to you guys, you took that moment away from me". Reid said no more, he was gone. As he walked away, head bowed, then did the tears start to fall.

Mitsuki just stared up at the ceiling as tears rolled down his cheeks. He counted each spiral and shape that had formed, time felt as if it had slowed down and the pain was gradually fading away. He was done, the thought of dying circled around and around in his head. Then he was Reid, remembering the time he first kissed him, held him and slept with him. The thought of leaving Reid broke Mitsuki's heart, he finally found someone who he truly cared about and he probably won't even see him again. Mitsuki laid back, his body slowly got heavier and heavier, his heart rate becomes weaker and weaker. Watching as the darkness clouded his vision before he was finally surrounded by darkness.

Muffled voices surrounded him, he couldn't make out a single one. The air grew heavier around him, he knew there were more than one or two people in a room because he could at least make our 5 maybe 6 voices. Mitsuki wanted to move but his body wouldn't let him, he was so scared, he didn't know if these people were here to save him or hurt him, or if they were here at all. After a few more minutes everything become a little clearer, he could make out 2 men's voices but didn't recognize either of them. But then a familiar voice broke through the rest. "Mitsuki! Mitsuki!" It was Reid, god was Mistuki releaved, he had finally found him, he was going to be okay. But he wasn't, as darkness took over once more.  
What felt like days had only been hours, the team all stood around in the waiting area, waiting impatiently to hear from the doctor. When Mitsuki was found, he was found in a bad way. Besides the word 'Fag' carved into his chest, he was badly beaten with a variety cut marks of all different sizes scattered all over. He was seriously dehydrated and his stomach was empty, with burn marks from where he'd thrown up so much. Reid couldn't sit still, he was pacing back and forth, continuously fiddling with someone, either it's his hands or hair. "Spence, he's going to be okay" JJ placed her hand on his, but he just pulled away and walked off in another direction, away from everyone.

"Do you think he'll ever forgive us?" Asked Garcia.

"To be honest Baby Girl, I don't know". Morgan said as he watched Reid. Spencer paced back and forth, hundreds of thoughts clouded his mind, he was so scared, scared of losing him, and scared something is just going to go wrong. His hands shook, he needed it, needed that. His body was craving a fix, but he had nothing on him he hadn't carried any in months. But then he remembered, he had something else that could work, something just as good. Reid walked over, picked up his bag and headed to the toilets without saying a word. "Reid you okay man?". But he just carried on walking.

Reid walked into the stall and closed the door behind him, he put the lid down on the toilet before sitting down. His whole body was shaking, sweat rolled down his face, all he wanted was to feel something, something other than the pain in his heart. Reid puts his messenger bag on his lap and scrambled around the contents. Inside lied papers, a book, some gum; which was left unopened and a little wash-like bag. He pulled out the small zipped up bag, he took out the countless amounts of tablets and sat at the bottom lied 2 small blades.

Reid took one out and tucked his bag under his arms, resting on his chest as if he was hugging it. Reid twiddled the blade between his fingers, watching as the silver metal gleamed slightly in the yellow glow of the hospital toilet lights. Memories poured back from the years of countless relapsing, memories of sitting alone as he is now, crying and watching as the lines of red appeared of his soft white skin. The memories were both painful yet exciting as if he was getting high on it. He sat for a few more minutes before being placed the blade on his skin, but he didn't get the chance to do anything, he didn't notice someone come into the toilets nor did he hear someone barge into the stall that was occupied by Spencer. A hand gripped firmly around his wrist, stopping the blade from moving, although a single red drop rolled off his arm where the blade had pushed in. Reid looked up and looked Morgan in the eyes, the rage and anger that ran across his face were more noticeable than a big light-up sign over his head. "What the fuck do you think you are doing?" Morgan shouted at him but in a quiet tone, as if it was muffled. Reid couldn't reply, his jaw just hung open as he watched Morgan change from looking him in the eyes and looking at the thing Spencer was doing. "Get out Morgan" Reid managed to push Morgan hand off his wrist, hiding the blade in his fist as he stood up pushing past Derek. "I don't have to explain myself to you" Reid turned on a tap, bending over and splashing his face with cold water.

"You do! What the hell is wrong with you?" Morgan, who still stood in the stall doorway, watched Spencer's every move.

"You got a nerve"

"Reid, this is enough now. We have all apologised to you, were trying to make it better but you're the one being stubborn and making in 10 times harder". Reid turned to Morgan. "Why did you do it man?"

"You saw didn't you" Reid looked at Derek. "I didn't do anything".

"But you were going too" Reid looked away. "Why man?"

"Why? WHY?" Reid was quick to snap, shocking Morgan. "Shall we go from the start?" He waited a moment for Morgan's to tell his 'enough is enough' or 'Okay I get it', but he didn't. "I was made to go undercover as a gay man, to hunt down a serial rapist and killer who was killing gays. All whilst struggling with my own sexuality, to then meet someone I actually truly like, to then share a special moment with him, but to be watched by my fellow teammates" Reid took a step closer to Morgan, his voice growing louder and louder. "That same guy is now lying in a hospital bed not knowing his fate after being kidnapped and tortured by that same fucking psychopath" Reid now screaming at Morgan didn't even realise he was crying, tears rolled down his bright red face and before he got the chance to stop, Derek pulled him in for a hug. "GET OFF ME!" Reid tried to pull away but it was if his arms wouldn't let him, as if they wanted his. That was it, Reid just burst into tears on Morgan's shoulder, grabbing tightly onto his shirt. Morgan wrapped both arms around him and held him close. "I'm so scared Derek" He sobbed some more. "What if...what if he doesn't"

"Don't think like that, you have to be strong for him" Reid pulled away from Morgan, eyes were red raw, cheeks pink and snot hung from his nose. "What would Mitsuki say if he saw you like this?"

"He would fall asleep outside my door to make sure I was okay" Reid choked. Morgan hung his head, he took hold of Spencer's wrist, to much resistance, Morgan pulled up his sleeve. Revealing the purple and red lines that decorated his skins. "And what would he say about these?" Morgan's heart sank as he looked at every line, every mark, old and new. This was his so-called best friend, the one he was meant to protect and be there for, instead he was suffering alone and in pain. He pulled down his sleeve and looked at Morgan. "I'm sorry" Morgan gave a sad smile.

"It's me who needs to apologize kid" He placed his hand on Spencer's back. "What I did was unforgivable, what I believed to be keeping you safe, I never thought how much it would hurt you".

"Yeah what you all did was wrong and unforgivable, but I understand why you did what you did, I was just embarrassed"

"Why?"

"Why?" Reid sniggered. "You watched as I had sex with a guy" Reid gave a sort laugh.

"How do you think I felt? Watching you mate sleep with a guy" They both laughed. "Look kid, no matter what, no matter who you love or who you sleep with, I still love you all the same" Reid smiled at him. "I know I can make jokes and take things too far, but doesn't mean I don't care"

"So you're cool with the whole gay thing?"

"Why wouldn't I be?" Morgan wrapped his arm around Reid's shoulder. "You're my brother after all".


	16. Fear Was All He Felt

"HELP ME!" Mistuki screamed at the top of his lungs.

"No one can heeear yooou!" The guy moved closer to him, (Mitsuki didn't want to keep calling him God and gave him the name John instead). The silver shine of the knife glistened in the haunting yellow glow of the low hanging light bulb in the middle of the room. Mitsuki could feel his chest tighten with every step John took towards him, heart beating so hard against is rib-cage he felt it just may burst. John stalked up to him with a clown-like smile, blue surgical gloves, and a white plastic apron. Mitsuki knew this was it, he may be a rookie cop but he had seen hundreds on crime drama's, and he knew this was the moment he was to die.

Mitsuki remembered the feeling of every cut, every slice and every moment John's fist connected with his face. The torture felt like it had been going on for hours, but in reality, it had on been 15 minutes. He could feel blood trickle down his arm, abdomen, and face, he could feel the bruises forming under his skin, he wanted nothing more at that moment then to die. John brought the knife down for the 8th time, creating a long thin slice across his chest, then another and another. "You see that Mitsuki?" John grabbed the bottom of his chin, lifting up his head to see the damage he has caused. "That is all you're sins being freed, all the filth and dirt that causes through you're veins" He threw his head back down allowing it to connect with the brown stained pillow.

Mitsuki began to sob, biting down on his bottom lip making sure that he doesn't make a sound. The taste of iron sat on his tongue, as his lip slit, pouring blood into his mouth.

Hours had passed since Mitsuki had blacked out, after another 15 minutes of torture, the pain had been too much for him. He woke up dazed and confused, as he tried to open his eyes, floods of light poured through. The room was spinning, he couldn't make out what was what as his vision blurred. He tried to lift himself up noticing the shackles around his wrists had been removed leaving behind only dark purple and red wrists. He lifted his head and took in a harsh gasp, a pain worse then a blade sat on his chest. He looked down to find the word 'Fag' carved heavily into his chest. He traced the lines with his fingers, this time he wanted nothing more but the scream, cry for help at the top of his lungs but no sound came out.

He tried to pull himself up and as painful as it was, he needed to get out, but pain struck him hard causing him to fall onto his back. Tears filled his eyes again. "Help". He took in a breath trying his hardest not to cry aloud. "Me Spence". He looked up at the ceiling, he could feel his body begin to give up, feeling it become heavier and heavier, his heartbeat began to slow down, and darkness drew into the corners of his eyes. Fear was all he felt.

The sound of people poured in, bright lights danced off the dark walls, colors fo blue, and red. Police. "Spencer" Mitsuki smiled.

"SIR HE'S LOOSING TO MUCH BLOOD!" The room was filled with Doctor's and Nurses, the sound of machines echoed off the walls, sweat poured off the Surgeons brow, "WHAT DO WE DO?". Said one of the nurses as she looked at the Surgeon. "GET ME 4 PINTS OF O NEG STAT".

"YES SIR!". The nurse ran off. "Come on son, pull through" The Surgeon lent into the body, blood poured from every cut, one cut, in particular, was causing havoc. A deep penetration sat from the right side of his collarbone to his left hip, the gash was so deep that the tissue had completely split away causing the wound to gape open revealing the inner organs. His heart was on clear view.

The Surgeon worked his best to stop the bleeding near the young man's heart, he could see the light pulse as it fought it's hardest to keep working. "TWEEZERS". His arm stretched out. "NEEDLE AND THREAD" The nurse passed him everything he needed, bloody still poured from the wound. "SUCTION". A long vacuum-like tubed appeared in front of his, sucking up the blood clotting near his heart. He began to close up Coronary Artery. Bright white light filled the room, doctors and nurses worked tirelessly for hours, trying to stop every bleed, every clot, and every infection, but after 5 hours in theatre, they began to grow tired. Trying to keep his blood pressure stable, trying to keep the young man alive.

"HE'S FLAT LINING!" The Surgeon looked at the heart monitor, the numbers which read 68 beats per minute had fallen to 0. "DEFIBRILLATOR!" The young nurse handed him the equipment. "UP 80 VOLTS...CLEAR...SHOCK!". The body jolted as an electrical current passed through the body. "NOTHING SIR".

"Bring up to 100...CLEAR...SHOCK". The body jolted again, and again and again until 200 volts of electrical current passed through his body.

He was unaware of what was happening around him, his body didn't feel like his own. He could feel it become lighter and lighter, his heartbeat was so faint he could barely register it, this sudden wash of relief flooded over him. The peacefulness of darkness had taken him.

Outside in the waiting area, Reid and Morgan had rejoined the group after their long talk in the men's toilets. They waited and waited, becoming restless. Hours had gone by and still no news on Mitsuki. Reid sat in one of the chairs, legs shaking, hands sat in a prayer like position at the base of his chin. JJ sat opposite him, then Emily and Garcia, Morgan beside him and Rossi and Hotch were stood up in the corner talking about the case. "Why haven't we heard anything yet?". Reid's voice filled with nerves.

"No news is good new's Spence". But just as JJ said that the Doctor came through the doors. "Mitsuki Nakamura". The doctor's voice was stern but soft.

"Yes". Everyone stood up. "And?". Spencer walked towards him. Everything was silent, he could hear his own heartbeat pounding against his chest.

"We tried everything we could". Reid's eye widened. "But..." The doctor couldn't finish his sentence before Reid felt himself become jelly, every limb of his body became weak, he couldn't hold himself up, stumbling forwards. Morgan was there to catch him as he gripped tightly to his shirt. Reid just broke, the sound of crying filled the room, "NOOOO!" JJ had covered her mouth to muffle the sound of her cries, as she watched her best friend fall to the ground, screaming. An emptiness filled Reid, his heart felt hollow and broken. He grabbed tightly to his chest and he carried on crying. Everyone watched Reid break, watched with a blurry vision.

"I am so sorry for your loss".


	17. Death Comes To Us All

A whole month had passed since Mitsuki passed away. Spencer hadn't been back to work since then, no one had seen or heard from him. The team went about their work just as they normally would, but not forgetting about Reid. They would all take it in turns to go to his apartment and check up on him, despite never opening the doors, they know he's alive because he will knock twice. JJ was the last to visit, she waited for the knocks and left, leaving behind a bag of food for him. But what he didn't know what that she was hidden on the stairwell, if not to talk to him but to at least see how he was doing.

Reid waited awhile before opening the door, when he saw it was all clear he piked up the bag left behind by JJ. He opened it up giving it a little smile, she always leaves a little note inside tell him that there all thinking about him, and that they are always there for him. JJ watched this, noticing the smiling. Reid had shaved in a while, created a small beard. Bags hung under his eyes, hair was unkept, clothes looked as if he hadn't changed them in days. He wore a pair of loose fitted lounge pants, a white t-shirt and a dark grey knitted cardigan with the sleeves rolled up.

That's when she noticed line upon line, upon line. His lower arms were riddled in fresh marks, some net and organised, others clearly slashed with a frenzy. JJ could feel a lump grow in her throat, a sickly feeling in the pit of her stomach. "What is he doing to himself in there?". She asked herself quietly.

Reid disappeared behind the closed door, it was the first time she had seen him, and what she saw, wasn't Reid.

Reid closed the door behind him, slumped over as he carried the bag towards the kitchen area, placing it down on the counter top. Taking out all the contents placing them in their correct places. He rolled down his sleeves hiding the marks, using his sleeves to scratch at them. after a good scratch he noticed he had pulled off one of the scabs causing the would to reopening, blood trickled down his forearm "SHIT!". He walked to the bathroom, grabbing the first aid kit out of the cabinet over the sink.

When he closed it he saw an unrecognisable face, one of someone so familiar. Himself. He cold see how much he had let himself go in the past month, how much of a mess he looked,but he didn't care. He lost the one person he's ever truly loved, why should he even bother anymore. He watched as his eyes welled up, watched as the unwanted teas streamed down his face. Tears that reminded him of Mitsuki, ones that reminded him of hearing the news he had died. Why him? He thought, why was it him that never had anything go right for him. His dad, mother, lover...he was doomed from day one.

Walking back into the living room, he noticed someone was there. "Hey Spencer". Spoke Morgan, his voice soft. Reid quickly rolled down his blood covered arm, hiding the marks he had created over the past month. "What-t ar-re yo-ou doing he-e-re Der-rek?". Reid's voice said shakily.

"Coming to check up on you of course". Reid turned away, walking to the table picking up the packet of smokes that sat there, taking one for the packet, and lighting up. He breathed out some smoke. "How did you get in here Derek?"

"Hotch has you're spear set of keys remember, he thought I'd be the best on to talk to you".

"It's been a whole month, I haven't heard a peep out of one of you guys in a month, besides the daily knocks at my door".

"Spencer...".

"True though, you've had my key this whole time, why now?" Reid looked at Morgan confused to why he visited, but then he remember, remembered the last person to visit him was JJ, she probably saw the marks on his arms, and told Hotch and Morgan. "It was JJ wasn't it?". Morgan nodded.

"She's worried about you man, we all are". Reid carried on smoking his cigarette. "She told me and Hotch, only us, about what you've done to yourself".

"And? Came here to tell me how bad it is, or I shouldn't be doing it or get home help Reid!". Reid shock his head as his killed the cigarette in the glass ashtray that sat on the table, piled high with old ends. "No Spencer, I'm here to see if you're okay?".

"Silly question don't you think?". Reid looked at Morgan. "I loose my boyfriend, and to cope I sit and wollow in my own self pity, cutting myself up instead of shooting up...". Morgan hated it when Reid was so direct, it made him uncomfortable.

"Reid...". Morgan's eye's naturally fell on the cut/scar covered arms, watching as the boy fiddled with the hem of the sleeve. "Let us in". Reid looked up. "We're all here for you, we all want to help you, please Spencer, let us in". Reid watched Morgans lips move, watched the words fall, not wanting to take in anything he had heard, just wanted to be able. "No thank you".

"Come on man, please".

"I said no Derek, look I've managed so many things in my life on my own. My father leaving, my bat shit crazy mother, being kidnapped, tortured, and drugged and then getting hooked. I escaped that all on my own, why would I need you now?". Reid was right, and Morgan knew it, he just didn't want to admit to it. The kid was strong, stronger then he could ever be, but there was something in his words that made Morgan feel as if it was a cry for help. "Spencer, I understand that, but you've also lost someone close to you, someone you love. You might be able to do it on you're own, but do you want too?".

Morgan's words stuck with Reid even long after he felt, was Morgan right? Reid knew he could probably make it on his own, but he falls a 1000 feet before he can try and work his way up and out. Reid slept on that idea, and slept on it for a whole week.

It had no been 5 weeks since Reid lost Mitsuki, and there was still no sign nor word from him. Hotch or JJ always text him about upcoming cases to see whether or not he was interested, but he never turned up. Hotch wasn't expecting him too as he official put him on leave, but the bosses are going to start to wonder why he's taking so long, and if he doesn't come back soon, he could be deemed to unfit. Reid knew this, of course he did, but he didn't know if he could do it anymore. He waited this long to see if he could really leave the job, but there was something inside of him which was calling him back, calling him that this is what he was destined to do, he lost one person, but he can safe a hundred more.

Hotch got to work early just like he did every morning, the first in to the dark bullpen. Turning on all the lights, he headed towards his office. He liked coming in so early because then he's alone with his thoughts and work. He settled in his office, by the time he realised it was already nearly 7.30, a whole 2 hours had passed. He looked outside his office window to see if anyone had turned up yet, but still silent. Just moments later his phone rings. "Hello, SSA Aaron Hotchner". Spoke Hotch, official and stern, like always,

"Hey Aaron, it's Wilson".

"Ah Wilson, how is he?".

"He's in good health, recovering well". Aaron heard someone walk into the pull pen, he got up and closed his office door. "Hotch even go home last night?". Emily asked to Morgan and JJ.

"Nah, he's lives here doesn't he". They all chuckled.

"Did you get my message regarding us finding the unsub, and everything is all good?". Hotch was only on the phone for another minute before hanging up, the team, when it comes to Hotch, stopped guessing when it came to his mysterious phone calls, they never figure it out. Hotch walks out his office. "Can someone call Reid, he has to be in from today". Hotch again was stern and harsh, even when it comes to their depressed co-worker. "Yes sir". Answered JJ.

But they didn't need too, Reid rocked up through the door of the BAU, on time, freshly shaven and clean clothed. "Spence!". JJ said with a huge smile. Everyone turned around.

"Hi guys". Reid said as he stood in front of them all awkwardly, as he did.

"Good to see you man!". Morgan was the first to give Reid a hug, panting him on the back before the next person, and the next and the next. "How you been?". Asked Emily. "You better?".

"As best I can be, but I'm getting there, slowly". He showed a small and dainty smile.

"Just so good to see you again!". Was all Emily could say before a high pitched scream came from behind Reid. Penelope dressed in a multitude of colours and shapes, dropped all her things and ran towards him. "Oh my beautiful boy genius". Garcia said as she squeezed his cheeks between her hands. "God, I don't think I could ever say this, but G-man, you've lost weight". He looked down, he knew he had gotten a lot skinny since he last saw them all, he barely eat and when he did he couldn't keep it down for long. When Morgan came round that was the first he was able to keep down a meal.

"I need you all in the round table room...". They all looked at Hotch, who headed there alone. They all carried on talking to Reid, not mentioning Mitsuki or the self-harming, just seeing on his general health and well-being. "Now!". They didn't know what had gotten into Hotch today but he was more sharp and harsh then he usually was. "Who put salt in his Cornflakes this morning". They all giggled as they walked up the stairs.

"Take a seat all of you please".

"Everything already Aaron?" Asked Rossi.

"Just over a month ago I made a decision to keep a victim safe, this decision had dire consequences...".

"Hotch where are you going with this?". It was Morgan, he was just as confused as the rest of them, but for some reason something specific wouldn't leave his mind. "A victim was in severe danger, he was in critical condition, but they managed to stabilise him before air lifting him to another hospital". Reid felt a pain in his chest, as if someone had wrapped their hand around his heart and squeezed.

"Hotch, wha-at ar-re you go-oing on ab-bou-tt?" Reid stuttered, images flashed in his head, but it couldn't be true surely.

"Behind closed doors we apprehended the Unsub, safeguarding the victim who until no has stayed within that same hospital, recovering". Everyone was stunned, slowly all looking at Reid who sat paralysed, not ever a blink.

"Yo-ou-re joki-ing me r-right?" Reid looked up at Hotch. But Hotch just shook his head, everyone's eye's still fixed on Reid. "He's alive? Mitsuki, he's alive?".


	18. Mitsuki

_"Just over a month ago I made a decision to keep a victim safe, this decision had dire consequences..."._

 _"Hotch where are you going with this?". It was Morgan, he was just as confused as the rest of them, but for some reason, something specific wouldn't leave his mind. "A victim was in severe danger, he was in critical condition, but they managed to stabilize him before airlifting him to another hospital". Reid felt a pain in his chest as if someone had wrapped their hand around his heart and squeezed._

 _"Hotch, wha-at ar-re you go-oing on ab-bou-tt?" Reid stuttered, images flashed in his head, but it couldn't be true surely._

 _"Behind closed doors we apprehended the Unsub, safeguarding the victim who until no has stayed within that same hospital, recovering". Everyone was stunned, slowly all looking at Reid who sat paralyzed, not even a blink._

 _"Yo-ou-re joki-ing me r-right?" Reid looked up at Hotch. But Hotch just shook his head, everyone's eye's still fixed on Reid. "He's alive?_ _Mitsuki, he's alive?"._

The words spun around and around in Spencer's head, he didn't know what the say or think. Was this a dream _, 'Am I still sleep right now?'_ No matter what reasoning he tried to talk his way, it all just didn't seem real. It was until someone jogged him that Reid realized he had actually stopped breathing, "Spence?" JJ soothing and soft voice felt as if it was miles away, everything seemed like it was a mile away.

"All this time..." Reid said quietly. "All this time!" Reid's voice raised, he became filled with rage, he darted his look towards Hotch who stood at the end off the table. "ALL THIS TIME YOU LIED TO ME AND HE WAS ALIVE!" Reid was on his feet, he wanted to go for Hotch, punch him, strangle him, kill him. But something or someone was holding him back. Reid just starred at him, lost for words, his brain became hazy and filled with nothing but fog. After nothing was said for over 30 seconds, a knock came at the door. "Dr Reid, someone hear to see you". One of their fellow agents was stood at the door, a young lad, tall, dark skinned with a tight fitted suite.

Reid didn't say anything, nor thank the boy, instead, he slowly turned, slowly turn in the direction of the ball pen. There, stood in the middle of the empty room, a tall man with long black hair and beautiful eyes. "Mits..." Reid couldn't finish his sentence, his lower lip began to wobble, tears rolled down his cheeks, his legs felt as if they would just collapse from underneath him. He slowly walked towards the door and Mitsuki walked towards him, he couldn't believe who was only a few feet away from him. He had longed for his embrace, his love, his smell, just everything. Spencer always had things go wrong for him, but this made him forget all those.

With only 6 feet between them, the shock had finally overcome Reid and without a moments thought he ran towards Mitsuki, who greeted him with open arms. The pair held each other, feel one another, Mitsuki's arm around Reid's neck and Reid's, around his waist. They held each other, to which felt like years but was only a minute or two. Reid's heart, which had stopped the moment he heard he lost Mitsuki, had finally started to beat again, finally feeling his body become warm, he could feel the love causing through his veins again.

"Spence I am so sorry!" Mitsuki's eyes were full of tears, face red and hot.

"Don't, please don't be sorry". Reid tone was soft and loving.

"I did a horrible thing to you, I can't imagine how you were feeling!". Mitsuki bowed his head.

"But you can, because as much as I didn't have you, you didn't have me either". Reid gave him a small but cute smile, one full of care.

"At least I knew you were alive, you had no idea!". Mitsuki's tear fell freely, as did Reid's. The team had all gathered around the bottom of the stairs, to watch the pair reunite, but Hotch, he stayed hidden within the round table room. "I'm so so sorry Spence!". But Reid didn't say anything just watched him, every movement he made, remembering all the details, even the little ones. "Spence I am sorry".

"Shut up!". Reid said suddenly.

"What?". Mitsuki was confused, but not surprised.

"I said, shut...". Reid moved closer to Mitsuki's face. "Up". Reid pulled Mitsuki in, crashing their lips together, the sweet, familiar taste of his sweet tasting lips came flooding back, the world spun around them as there sweet and innocent kiss soon turned more passion, filled with fire. Reid placed his hands on Mitsuki's cheeks, holding him tightly, feeling Mitsuki's tear's between his fingers, feeling his cheeks burn up.

Their mouths moved perfectly with one another, tasting every inch, taking in every small moment. Reid lost everything, his love and his life and all of a sudden, as his prayers, had been answered he had them both back, and they were both in the form of Mitsuki.

They kissed last a few more seconds, moving with one another, tongue crashing against tongue, not battling for dominance but both sharing the battlefield. They slowly pulled away from each other, still, in the others embrace, Reid smiled as he placed his forehead on Mitsuki's. "You guy's done yet?". Said Morgan, who covered his eyes with his hands, jokingly of course. The pair turned around, faces red with embarrassment as they completely forgotten that they weren't alone, but had an audience.

Reality snapped back into place for Reid, he looked for Hotch and saw a shadow in the room above them, Reid didn't wait for anybody, he left Mitsuki out of his grips and darting towards Hotch, who was stood in front of the whiteboard. "DON'T YOU FUCKING DARE..." Hotch turned round to be welcome by Reid's oncoming fist, he didn't even try to dodge but took it as he deserved too. He hit the floor with a bit of a thud, Reid isn't one for fighting or violence, him hitting his boss was something more shocking than watching Reid bone a guy.

"DON'T YOU EVER DO THAT TO ME AGAIN!". Spencer's eyes were filled with hatred, what was only moments ago filled with nothing but loved as he looked at Mitsuki, but are now filled with his hate for Hotch. "Spencer I'm sorry".

"You're sorry? You're sorry?". This only made Reid's blood boil more. "5 Weeks I went thinking my boyfriend WAS DEAD!" His voice grew. "I felt my whole world had tumbled down! How could you do that to me?".

"For his safety". Spoke Hotch as he picked himself up off the ground wiping away the blood the formed out his lip.

"You could have done all that but still keep me in the loop". Reid looked at him, hatred in his eye's was still there in full, but now with sadness, confusion, betrayal and more. Hotch was family to him, he hurt him before with the camera's, but this, this is so much worse. "It wouldn't have been safe for either of you" Hotch looked Reid dead in the eyes. "You were being hunted as well, that is why we told you the unsub had been caught and killed but Mitsuki was also killed. It was the safest and toughest option...and trust me I went in this knowing I would come out with you hating me".

"Hatred doesn't even come close, Aaron!". Reid's voice was steady but angry. His hands lay down his side, the right trembling as bruises formed on the knuckles. The rest of the team and Mitsuki stood in the doorway of the roundtable room, just watching. Reid stood tall, "After everything, Aaron, the camera's, spying, and now this". Reid looked directly into his eyes. "I will never forgive you". The words struck Hotch harder than he expected. After Gideon left, he promised to look out for this kid, care for him and help him understand the world, but never did he teach him to understand betrayal. He had so much of it from his father, and now from his second family, one of the people he trusted most, let him down. "Spencer, please". Hotch had never begged before, nor have they seen him cry, other than when Hayley died.

"You will expect my letter of resignation tomorrow".

"Spence you can't!". JJ said with a shaky voice. Spencer didn't even turn to look at her just kept his eyes on Hotch. "Yeah come on man, I understand you're angry but with time...".

"With time what Morgan". He breaks his eye contact and looks at his team. "With time I'll forgive the man who placed camera's in and around my apartment to see if I was doing drug? The man who lied to me about my boyfriend dying? When Morgan, When can I forgive that?". Reid's voice was so hard and sharp, every word his spoke felt as if he was stabbing them.

"I understand it will be hard, but this is who you are". Morgan was right and Reid knew it, he knew nothing else but the BAU, he didn't want to leave, he wanted to stay with his family, but he couldn't be near him, he couldn't be near Hotch. "I'll leave". Reid turns suddenly on his heels in the direction of the voice. Hotch. "I will leave". Hotch looked at them all, shocked.

"What?".

"I have been thinking about it for a while now anyway, and I can't possibly have Reid leave, it's all my fault after all".

"Aaron, you can't?" Rossi didn't quite know what to say.

"Spencer, you are staying". Reid just looked at him confused. "I need a 9-5 job anyway". Hotch showed a painful smile.

"Aaron, you're not leaving!". Everyone was shocked to realize that it was Reid who said that.

"Look, I can't explain how much I hate you right now...".

"Not helping Reid!". Said Morgan.

"...but, you are this team, and this team needs you. Yes, what you did, I will never forgive you, but I will never forgive myself if you leave this team. I am young and can get a job pratically anywhere". Reid took in a deep breath. "This IS who you are Aaron, and you promised not only Jack to save the bad guys but Hayley".

"Why are you doing this Reid?". Hotch was confused, only moments ago Reid was shooting daggers at him, wanting to kill him, and now he's, he's caring?

"I don't even know myself". He looked at Hotch. "You'll have my letter before the day has ended". Reid turned and headed towards the door. He felt a hand grab his wrist.

"Please". JJ's eyes become red and voice was shaky as she tried to hold back the tears. Reid gently placed his hand on JJ's before removing hers. "I'm Sorry". With that, Reid walked out, down the stairs. But he was stopped. "NO!". It was Mitsuki, he had moved past the others and stood at the top of the stairs before following Reid down. "You're not leaving!".

"Mitsuki it's done".

"No, no it's not!". They looked at no another, the others watched, baffled. "You are not leaving this team, because if you do then you lose me".

"What? Mistuki don't be so stupid!".

"Spence, that is exactly what you are being right now, stupid!".

"No I am not, he hurt me".

"Yeah Aaron hurt you, but he did it to save me...doesn't that tell you something?". Reid both understood what he was saying but didn't want to believe it. "He saved my life". Reid never looked at it like that before, he just saw it as Hotch hurting him, taking away the person he loved most, but he never thought of him saving that loved one. "He saved my life, Spence. If it wasn't for Hotch then I would be dead". He moved closer to Reid, taking his head. "I know what he did and how he did it was wrong and I understand if you don't want to forgive him. But you'll never forgive yourself if you leave this team". Mistuki laced his fingers in with Reid's. "I, will never forgive you".

The words stuck to Reid hard, he didn't quite know what to say, because he was right, Mistuki was right, Hotch HAD saved his life. He took in a deep breath, slowly letting it out. "I will not forgive you!". Reid looked up, Hotch had joined the other, he took was shocked to hear Mitsuki saving his arse. "What you did, I can never forgive, but he's right. Mistuki is right". Reid moved away from Mistuki, taking his hand out of his grasp and headed towards Hotch. "As much as I hate to say it, he is right". He was now standing directly in from of his boss. "If I leave I will regret it, and no matter how much time will pass, this, this will never be forgiven. But in time". The team watched in silence, the girls crying, even Morgan's eyes swelled up. "I can come to forgive you".

Hotch said nothing, instead, he did the unthinkable, something no one has seen or received from Hotch, he pulled Reid in for a hug, patting his back before pushing away, gently. "I truly am sorry".

Nothing much more was said after that, Reid had been given a week leave to spend time with Mistuki, get him settled and for him to have a break. Back at Reid's apartment, they sat curled up on the sofa, with something but a thin blanket to cover them. Clothes sprawled out on the floor, and the smell of sex and sweat filled the air. Mistuki had his back on Reid's chest, with Reid's arm wrapped around his chest. Reid leaned in and kissed the base of Mitsuki's neck which sent shivers up his spine. "I can't believe you're really here". Spencer said with a smile as he planted another kiss on his neck, this time higher up. "I am never letting you go again!". Mistuki giggled. "When do you move in then?".


	19. Author's Note - Thank You

Hello!

Well, that's it :) This has been a long 2 years (I started this story elsewhere first). I know it's not perfect, and my grammar isn't 100% perfect, but this was just for fun and the fan base I have grown, is amazing! So thank you, everyone, for following the story all this time...but don't worry that isnt the end of Reid and Mitsuki, I am planning on doing a series of short stories, based after this fic, but also during it. That's why some of the chapters are short and don't go into depth, I wanted to keep that a thing, so you'll be excited when more comes out.

I thought of this idea when I hated the chapters and content I had created, I didn't feel like I went into enough depth and wanted to rewrite a lot of the chapters once I had finished. But instead, I'll add them and expand them into mini-stories, for example...Mituski's getting kidnapped and having it from his point of view, or Reid's break down etc. What do you think to this idea? Please comment and let me know...and again I know my grammer isn't perfect and some of the content is rather rushed.

But I hope you have enjoyed this journey as much as I have, even if it's had moments of break downs, wanting to delete it and dealing with hate...but I am proud of what I have created. so again...Thank you! and see you soon


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